It was a double date. Me & my girl and my boy & my girl’s neighbor. It was their first date. As we take our seats, this chick looks me in my eyes and ask, “You guys are paying right?”

I’m not even sure if this woman even said ‘Good evening’ or anything to me before this. https://twitter.com/nateisback2/status/1381610076054679552

My girl is looking at the menu to hide her secondhand embarrassment. My boy is looking at her, mystified. I’m confused too... because, okay let’s say her question was cool.

Why ask me?

I’m not your date ma’am?

Anyways, to keep the peace I answered, “Of course, we are.”

Then she hurriedly perused the menu. Now, my girl knew my economic standing in life. We both worked in retail. She was looking at the deals. What a keeper.

So we’re ready to place our orders right. Me and my girl go first. We both ordered some pasta shit, idr. I think we both ate before we even got there.

Anyways, it was my boy and his date’s turn. This lady orders a rack of ribs....... like off the rip.

I think the waitress even asked “By yourself?”, and this chick nodded happily.

Bro, I was shook.

Ain’t no way this girl about to order a whole rack of ribs just bc we’re paying. Ain’t no way. My boy ordered some pasta shit too.

I had to step out for a smoke. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

They bring our meals out. We’re all eating normal dinners. This chick got a whole rack of ribs.

Y’all ever ate ribs? Theres no way to eat them cute. I lost my appetite watching this pig in front of me. Smoked again.

We’re ready to pick up the tab right. The waitress asks if we want to takeout box. Everyone says no. Except... you guessed it!

Now, I had to ask. “You’re gonna have leftover ribs tomorrow?”

“Yeah, imma have em for breakfast.”

I was about to lose it.

The waitress bring the check back and she hands the check to me... yet again, some random chick thinks I’m the bankroll.

Anyways, I view the damage. The tab of me and my chick, was gonna be around $30. My boy’s meal was like $18 yet the total tab was $98.

Someone ordered ribs.

Now, me and my boy supposed to split it evenly. Idk why I agreed to that like a dumbass bc the math is telling me I’m paying more what I fucking ate. I was pissed.

It gets better. His card doesn’t work and fatso looked like one of her arteries was about to clog.

That’s right. I had to foot the entire bill. $98.

To this day, even the sight of a rack of ribs make me wanna throw up.