when zak tells Trucy “I love you” it’s a fall off the tongue kind of phrase. it’s easy, instinctual in the way that performing is to both of them. Trucy’s always admired her biological father’s ability to always know what the audience wants to hear.

that’s what I love you’s were to him. they weren’t untrue—Trucy would have known if they were. but first and foremost her father was a magician and she was a part of his act. “Gramarye” was always the name of a troupe with family as an afterthought.

When Phoenix says “I love you” for the first time, it gives her pause. There’s a weight there that she’s not used to. He looks at her like he’s asking for permission—wondering if it’s alright. Her new daddy says I love you like he’s not quite sure how.

He fumbles over them and backtracks, trying to figure out just the right inflection to each syllable. There’s a bit of fear in it, too, like he’s afraid to get it wrong. And for the first time in her life Trucy rethinks what those words are supposed to mean.

Every time Phoenix says “I love you” he’s making a promise—he doesn’t know exactly how being a dad is supposed to work and he knows he messes up sometimes, but he’s going to keep trying. He’s going to try for as long as she’ll let him.

And when Trucy says it back she starts to mirror the new meaning, because it’s the only way she knows how to say that she’s new to all this too. This isn’t the version of family shes been taught but it’s the version she chooses. They say it for no audience other than themselves.

Trucy’s “I love you”s are the truth as only she understands it—which is to say she still doesn’t quite get it, but she knows what it looks like when she sees it. it has a worth to her now it never did before, and that stings a bit, but it’s something worth cherishing, too.