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Most of us know about Fight, Flight, and Freeze.
They're the most commonly discussed trauma responses.
However, FAWN is a trauma response that's so often employed by Black folks during traffic stops.
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They're the most commonly discussed trauma responses.
However, FAWN is a trauma response that's so often employed by Black folks during traffic stops.
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Fawn: immediately responding to someone with every effort to appease them and de-escalate the situation.
Ex.
- Hands glued to the wheel
- Move ONLY after announcing intent to reach for license or insurance
- Hyperawareness to say "yes SIR, MA'AM, or OFFICER"
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Ex.
- Hands glued to the wheel
- Move ONLY after announcing intent to reach for license or insurance
- Hyperawareness to say "yes SIR, MA'AM, or OFFICER"
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The fawn response is mentally exhausting as all your effort is employed to estimate the "appropriate" ways to de-escalate the possibility of harm.
You go through mental gymnastics trying to predict your next steps based on their reaction/demeanor.
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You go through mental gymnastics trying to predict your next steps based on their reaction/demeanor.
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No matter the outcome, feelings of shame can arise... especially if things escalate. God forbid you didn't handle it "correctly"... or you experience feelings of disgust at having to shrink yourself, disregard your needs, and make yourself "less than" to survive the moment.
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Let's be honest, the fawn response doesn't stop there.
It happens at work with colleagues, out shopping, or a simple walk around the neighborhood.
It is a constant state of hyperawareness and mental exhaustion that some people will never understand.
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It happens at work with colleagues, out shopping, or a simple walk around the neighborhood.
It is a constant state of hyperawareness and mental exhaustion that some people will never understand.
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What's even more heart wrenching?
The reality of knowing that you can do everything "correctly" and still be subjected to violence.
But learning of continued violence, particularly situations we could easily find ourselves in... well it's traumatic.
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The reality of knowing that you can do everything "correctly" and still be subjected to violence.
But learning of continued violence, particularly situations we could easily find ourselves in... well it's traumatic.
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There's a term for it... secondary traumatic stress. It can mirror the same symptoms of PTSD.
With that context, I hope we wouldn't shame ourselves for not feeling or operating at 100%.
We're not meant to carry all of this trauma.
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With that context, I hope we wouldn't shame ourselves for not feeling or operating at 100%.
We're not meant to carry all of this trauma.
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While the fawn response isn't limited to Black folks. That is who I'm talking about in THIS moment.
Do not respond to this thread with "what about" or "Black people aren't the only."
Read the Room or Be Blocked.
Because I'm not YOUR therapist + I'm not here to coddle feelings.
Do not respond to this thread with "what about" or "Black people aren't the only."
Read the Room or Be Blocked.
Because I'm not YOUR therapist + I'm not here to coddle feelings.
