I told a bootlicker that pizza delivery drivers have more dangerous jobs than cops so they asked me who I'd rather call if my house was burglarized or my car stolen I gotta say I'd much rather have a fresh-baked pizza pie after such a traumatic experience than have to answer

a bunch of intrusive, probing questions from a fascist who may or may not follow-up with me 6-18 months later to tell me they picked someone up trying to hawk my stereo and while he didn't have anything else of mine they're charging him with burglary and betting on a plea deal

and my stereo is being held as evidence but I might be able to get it back after the trial except the cop copied down my address wrong and after the property lock-up can't contact me they auction my boombox off for money to buy new guns with which that same cop uses to hold my

neighbor's son at gunpoint because he matched the description of someone and there had been a lot of burglaries in the area recently and now that kid has PTSD and the cop gets a promotion and the person caught with my stereo is serving time plus the pizza would get there faster