Covid has definitely laid bare our selfishness and utter lack of care for other people. It's also at least for me, exposed that many of us cannot deal with things that are not fun or uncomfortable. Which is why I think some folks are like eff it.

One of my own personal issues, that drives others crazy, is that I actually don't expect life to peaches and cream all the time. I feel deeply that suffering is part of the human experience, and by denying that suffering is normal we really aren't doing ourselves any favors.

Admittedly living through a pandemic is a lot of suffering, but even pre Covid, people lacked the ability to sit with the uncomfortable or the inconvenient.

As a collective, we were not emotionally, mentally or spiritually prepared for something as epic as a pandemic.

I know people mean well when they acknowledge that the last year was rough for me, but honestly it sits uncomfortable with me. My Dad knew death would visit him, after my Mom's death, he spent 17 years preparing us for the day when we would be parent-less.

Losing Pops in a pandemic was awful, and I can tell you now, on my Mom & Dad. My Dad would have f*cking hated this life we are living. The politics, the idiocy, the Covid.

There was no mistake or tragedy, my Pops was ready to leave, I just wasn't ready, but you adjust.

The weird gift of losing your parents and your entire family of elders early in life, is that I have no preconceived notions or expectations that I am living a long, happy life.

Nope, it's day by day. My man gets weird when I tell him, I will be thrilled to get to 70.

Anyway, find joy even in the chaos, we can't predict anything, so find a minute that isn't heavy, if you can.

As for me, time to get dressed soon to get my 2nd shot. I am anxious, scared and excited.