My dad has been hospitalized with severe COVID for the last five days. After a scary phase of worsening conditions, he started making progress today.

Now that I have a breather, thought I'd jot down some ways you can support your family/friends during a COVID situation: Thread

(a.k.a Things I wish I could tell my extended family but they will never listen so I'm once again using Twitter to cope)

1. Give the primary caretakers space. We understand your concern for the patient and the family but constantly badgering with messages/demanding updates drains what little energy we already have. Ideally (personally at least) drop a message of concern, tell the caretaker +

+ you're around if they need help/support and tell them they don't have to reply to you urgently. They will reach out if they need your help.

2. Please don't pretend to have all the solutions. This pandemic comes with a lot of fake news and misinformation. WhatsApp forwards are not the most credible source of info. You may have recieved information from someone you trust but pls always verify the information before +

You share it with the rest of the family and increase panic. There is already enough panic wrt the new strain, the surge in cases etc all. Let's not add to that.

3. This is really not the time for ego flexes. Again, I understand the intention to help, but calling the Defence minister's bodyguard in Delhi will not help my dad, who is in Bangalore, recover any faster. Yes, you have connections and influence, but please don't reach out+

To your 'networks' and 'contacts' without getting the consent of the primary caretakers or unless they ask you. That only adds more (and irrelevant) people into a already complicated and stressful situation.

4. Pls remember that caretakers are juggling a lot - going to the hospital constantly, figuring out insurance and finances, having to get themselves tested and isolated, constantly updating the whole family, some still have to manage their jobs, cooking, managing mental health +

Try your hardest to not place more strain on them.

5. Please promise help and support only if you can. And if possible, be specific. Let them know if you can be on ground and go to the hospital on their behalf, send them food, help financially, send them verified info to help them understand the situation better. Knowing who to +

+ contact for what really helps streamline communication amidst this chaos.

6. No time is a good time to shit on mental health, but especially now? Very bad idea. Don't stop people from crying, don't police their feelings, clothes, what/how much they eat. People cope differently and everyone is trying their best to make sense of these shitty times.

7. Our healthcare system is really not equipped to handle this pandemic. And I say this as someone whose dad is admitted in one of the best private hospitals in an urban area. Our doctors and health care workers are unbelievably overworked and stressed and the govt is doing +

very little to make the situation safer. There are shortages of beds, medicines, a lot of panic and misinformation. In this, calling different doctors from the same hospital for updates or info only adds to the stress of the doctor tending to your loved one. Please trust them.

8. Indian families have the awful habit of never talking about money openly. Please break that. This is expensive. Even with a govt cap, private hospitals charge b/w Rs. 15,000-25,000 per night for a bed. And usually people are admitted for a week. Additionally, there are +

Scan costs, medicines, injections, family expenses, transport, testing etc all. Even with insurance, savings and generally being well-to-do, it is a tough financial situation. If you have the money, be generous. If you know families, people who need finances to help with COVID +

Please DM, I will amplify it and share it with those who may be able to contribute.

9. Lastly, the MOST useful way you can help is to mask up, socially distance yourself, get yourself tested if you've been around people/travelled, get eligible people in your family vaccinated, don't go outdoors until absolutely necessary and PLEASE take this seriously.