"Husbands, continue loving your wives, just as the Christ also loved the congregation and gave himself up for it.​" —Eph. 5:25.

In the family, a husband is to love his wife “as the Christ does the congregation.” (Eph. 5:28, 29)

But how can he do that in these times?

1/4

A husband must imitate the self-sacrificing love of Christ by putting his wife’s needs and interests ahead of his own. Some men may find it difficult to show such love, perhaps because they were not raised in an environment where treating others fairly and lovingly was valued.

2

It may be difficult for them to unlearn bad habits, but they must make these changes in order to obey the law of the Christ. A husband who shows self-sacrificing love gains his wife’s respect.

But how about being, not just a good husband, but also a good father?

Simple...

3/4

A father who truly loves his children would never abuse them by what he says or does. (Eph. 4:31) Instead, he expresses his love and approval in ways that make his children feel safe and secure. Such a father gains the love and trust of his children.

4/4

-END-

w19.05 6 ¶21

This thread, naturally, triggers a question which has caused such a global stir in recent years:

Why does the Bible record God as making the husband head of the wife?

What does that headship mean?

Is it about authority?

Or is it something else?

Here's the thread...

0/20

What does the word “headship” mean to you? Some men allow tradition, culture, or their own family background to determine the way they treat their wife and children.

Note the observations of Yanita and Luke:

1/20

“Where I live, there is a deeply ingrained view that women are inferior to men and should be viewed as servants.”
YANITA, EUROPE

“Some fathers teach their sons that women should be seen and not heard, that their opinion is not important.”
LUKE, USA

2/20

Do such attitudes reflect the way God wants men to exercise their headship.

No. Jesus said:

"You make the word of God invalid by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things like this.” — Mark 7:13.

How, then, can a man learn to be a good family head?

3/20

To be a good family head, a man must first understand what God requires of him. He also needs to know why God established headship and, specifically, how he can imitate the example set by Jehovah and Jesus. Why is it important for a man to gain such knowledge?

4/20

Because God has given family heads a measure of authority, and he expects them to use it well.​

Jesus said:

"Everyone to whom much was given, much will be demanded of him, and the one who was put in charge of much will have more than usual demanded of him." — Luke 12:48b

5/20

So, what is Headship?

1 CORINTHIANS 11:13

"I want you to know that the head of every man is the Christ; in turn, the head of a woman is the man; in turn, the head of the Christ is God."

This verse describes the way in which God has organized his universal family.

How?

6/20

Headship involves two key elements:
​1. Authority
2. Accountability.

God is “the head,” or the ultimate authority, and all his children, both angelic and human, are accountable to him.

Paul explained it this way:

(Rom. 14:10; Eph. 3:14, 15)

7/20

ROM. 4:10
"But why do you judge your brother? Or why do you also look down on your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God."

EPH. 3:14,15
"For this reason I bend my knees to the Father, to whom every family in heaven and on earth owes its name."

8/20

God has given Jesus authority over the congregation, but Jesus is accountable to God for the way he treats us. (1 Cor. 15:27)

God has also given a husband authority over his wife & children, but a husband is accountable to both God & Jesus for the way he treats his family.​
9/20

1 PETER 3:7
"You husbands, in the same way, continue dwelling with them according to knowledge. Assign them honor as to a weaker vessel, the feminine one, since they are also heirs with you of the undeserved favor of life, IN ORDER FOR YOUR PRAYERS NOT TO BE HINDERED."

10/20

As Head of his universal family, God has the authority to make rules about how his children should behave, and he is able to enforce those rules.—Isa. 33:22

Jesus, as head of the Christian congregation, also has the right to make and enforce rules.​—Gal. 6:2; Col. 1:18-20

11/20

Following the pattern set by God and Jesus, the head of a Christian family has the authority to make decisions for his family. —Rom. 7:2; Eph. 6:4

However, his authority has limits. For example, his rules should be based on principles found in God’s Word. (Prov. 3:5, 6)

12/20

Note that a family head does not have the authority to make rules for those who are not part of his family. (Rom. 14:4)

Also, when his sons and daughters grow up and leave home, they continue to respect him, but they are no longer under his headship.

Jesus said it well:

13/20

MATTHEW 19:5
"For this reason a man will LEAVE HIS FATHER AND HIS MOTHER and will STICK TO HIS WIFE, and the two will be one flesh."

So...

WHY DID GOD ESTABLISH HEADSHIP WITHIN A MARRIAGE/FAMILY?

The reason is both practical and loving. And you can reason along here...

14/20

God established headship out of love for his family. It is a gift from him. Headship makes it possible for the family to function in a peaceful, orderly way.

1COR. 14:33,40
"God is a God not of disorder but of peace.
Let all things take place decently and by arrangement."

15/20

Without the clear-cut role of headship, the family would become disorganized and unhappy. For example, no one would know who should make final decisions and who should take the lead in carrying out those decisions.

But, wait, come to think of it...

16/20

If God’s arrangement for headship is such a good thing, why do so many women today feel oppressed and dominated by their husband?

This is because many men ignore God’s standards for the family and choose instead to follow local customs or traditions.

And there's more...

17/20

They may also abuse their wives to satisfy some selfish desire. For example, a husband might dominate his wife in an attempt to boost his self-respect or to prove to others that he is a “real man.”

Still more...

18/20

A man may reason that he cannot force his wife to love him, but he can make her fear him. And he may use that fear as a way to control her.

Do you see a pattern?

What do you think, personally, of such a line of reasoning?

What might such thinking lead to?

19/30

That type of thinking and conduct clearly deprives women of the honor and respect to which they are entitled, and it is directly opposite to what God (the originator of the family and family headship) wants.​

See the difference as Paul points out at Ephesians 5:25, 28:

20/30

EPHESIANS 5:
v25
"Husbands, continue loving your wives, just as the Christ also loved the congregation and gave himself up for it."

v28
"In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. A man who loves his wife loves himself."

21/30

So...

HOW CAN A MAN LEARN TO BE A GOOD FAMILY HEAD?

For starters...

A man can learn to be a good family head by imitating the way that God and Jesus exercise their headship.

What examples can we learn from both? And how can we make this more practical than theoretical?

22/30

Consider just two of the qualities manifested by both, and note how a family head can show those qualities when dealing with his wife and children.

Those qualities are HUMILITY and LOVE.

What lessons can each teach us?

23/30

1. HUMILITY

God is the wisest Person in existence; yet, he listens to the opinions of his servants. —Gen. 18:23, 24, 32

He has allowed those under his authority to offer suggestions. —1 Ki. 22:19-22

He is perfect, but he does not, at present, expect perfection from us.

24/30