This month has been so hard for me... I can feel all the pressure of me having to stay clean from self harm because this month on the 25th is my 2 yr mark. I won’t lie, I’ve thought about it nearly everyday this month, I just fear to tell others about because I don’t want ...

Pity or encouragement, I want understanding, understand that yes I’ve nearly been 2 yrs clean but that doesn’t make the urges any less difficult, understand that I may accidentally push you away without even realizing it until you point it out... understand that under stress ...

And pressure that I may emotionally snap, I don’t want to be viewed as a broken person when that very much isn’t the case. I have come such a long way for anyone to undermine me or misunderstand. I’m human and I’ve made mistakes and grew from them, but every now and then...

I may have set back, depression and anxiety doesn’t simply “go away” sure I can put on a mask and pretend everything is okay especially on social media, but that only makes the urge to self harm rise, pretending to be okay make me feel more not okay.

Sorry for those of you who actually read through this thread, but life’s been a bitch this month, and with this anniversary coming up I feel more anxious than ever... 2 yrs is a big deal!