some thoughts on doomstrologizing, pattern repetition, and personal narrative

(first of all, shout out to @charm_astrology for coining doomstrologizing and giving a voice to all us anxiety-prone sky watchers)

so the tl recently has been filled with talk about the mars rx in gemini of 2022. this time we'll get a whopping 7 months of mars in gemini. it's a long time to be in one transit, and i know a lot of us are apprehensive

astrology is fascinating. while precise arrangements of the planets very, very rarely repeat, certain patterns do as individual planets make their way around the zodiac and interact with one another. the particular circumstances will almost always be different, but themes remain

one of my favorite uses of astrology is in understanding a life narrative and seeing both the repetition and variation in a person's story. repeating patterns often activate similar themes and events and create threads that run through the life of a person (or anything)

this is of course why, when we (the astro intrigued and/or literate) see a big transit or timing event coming up, we'll look back on previous iterations of this pattern for predictive clues. this gives us a way to know what to expect

but of course, this is also exactly how doomstrologizing begins. when we are pain or trauma or challenges in the past, it can be easy to assume the worst. at the very least, it can create more anxiety about the future

to get personal for a minute, i just decided to check out the last few mars in gemini transits. and i didn't like what i found. for several years now, mars in gemini has been a relationship-ending transit for me (gemini is my 8H, so i'm not surprised)

seeing a pattern like that over and over is scary. and of course i immediately jumped to the worst. more loss, more pain, more heartbreak. i'm still mourning so much, so what if i have to do it all over again?

then i looked closer. mars in gemini in 2017 served me a heartbreak that wrecked me. quite literally, like the lowest of the low in terms of how i reacted. i was already at a low point and it sent me into a tailspin. but that was also the catalyst for massive growth

i am a completely changed person since that relationship ended, because it spurred me into the mental health treatment i needed. it also pushed me into a more spiritual existence and more interest in the esoteric, and now that's a huge part of my life

2019 was another step toward my relational growth. i did things i never thought i could in the name of self protection. i sank into depression, but i survived and learned even more about myself

and yes, this mars in gemini has been a repetition of a theme, but it feels different. with each of these losses, i feel a little stronger, a little less destroyed by the ending of something. i handle things better. i trust myself more

there's a very obvious story here. mars in gemini brings me loss and heartbreak. but when i look more closely, that's not at all the full story. mars in gemini for me is a story about resilience

it's a story about attachment, about how i hold onto people like life preservers and am terrified to let go. it's a story about how, when i stop being so afraid to let go, i remember to learn how to swim

for the anxiety-prone astrologer, doomstrologizing may be somewhat inevitable. but as much as you look for repetition, look for variation. what is different even among situations that are similar? how did you change?

i'm very much not a "your thoughts create reality" person. but i do know firsthand that the way you tell the story of your life has a huge impact on how you view yourself and the future. and that all depends on what details you choose to make significant

i hold myself very differently if i see the last few years as a story of bi-annual loss than if i see them as a process of growth and healing attachment wounds through hardship and through some degree of pain

the facts remain the same, but storytelling is only partly about what actually happened. think about the best storytellers you know. they always seem to know what details will make the most impact, what will resonate most

if you catch yourself doomstrologizing, start to look for the details you're leaving out. ask yourself if the story you're crafting is the only possible story there is, or if there's some other narrative embedded that anxiety is clouding for you

it's difficult to get out of the mindset of assuming the worst, but stretching yourself to tell new stories creates agency and turns the repetitions of previously painful patterns into possibilities for writing new chapters into ongoing stories

you are always evolving and the sky is always changing. you are not doomed to repeat the same stories without any chance for new endings. let astrology guide you into writing new stories

and as always, if it's too much or too painful to look back, you are never obligated to astrologize about the future. life will happen whether or not you're waiting for the other planet to drop