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10 bitter truths about how we live our lives
A thread...
A thread...
Bitter Truth #1
Most life advice is simple.
Not easy.
Simple!
But...
"It can't be this simple. There has to be a more complex explanation."
And we keep searching for that complexity.
Most life advice is simple.
Not easy.
Simple!
But...
"It can't be this simple. There has to be a more complex explanation."
And we keep searching for that complexity.
We do not believe most things that we should believe in, simply because they are "too simple".
Bitter Truth #2
We will forget how we felt
We will trick ourselves into how we felt back then, which would be very different from how we actually felt.
We will always exaggerate the pain we felt.
We will undermine the joy we experienced.
We will forget how we felt
We will trick ourselves into how we felt back then, which would be very different from how we actually felt.
We will always exaggerate the pain we felt.
We will undermine the joy we experienced.
Until we do not document, we will never have a way of truly knowing what is it that we went through, that moment.
Bitter Truth #3
We copy each other.
We do not know what we want.
So the best option is to follow what others are doing.
We think we are in the same race.
So doing the same things, will get us the same results.
We copy each other.
We do not know what we want.
So the best option is to follow what others are doing.
We think we are in the same race.
So doing the same things, will get us the same results.
Everyone is running a different race.
In fact, we're not even in a race.
We're on our own paths.
Some walk. Some run. Some stay still.
In fact, we're not even in a race.
We're on our own paths.
Some walk. Some run. Some stay still.
Bitter Truth #4
We are rarely curious
School, college, parents, the world over time, systematically, killed our curiosity.
We were trained to not ask, but to only answer.
And if the answer is right, we were rewarded.
So we stopped asking, "why?"
"Why am I doing what I'm doing?"
We are rarely curious
School, college, parents, the world over time, systematically, killed our curiosity.
We were trained to not ask, but to only answer.
And if the answer is right, we were rewarded.
So we stopped asking, "why?"
"Why am I doing what I'm doing?"
If you are curious, you are alive.
If you are not, you are simply a slave to someone else's curiosity.
If you are not, you are simply a slave to someone else's curiosity.
Bitter Truth #5
We think failure leads to success
Everyone in the world fails.
Everyone!
But not everyone succeeds.
So it is not failure that leads to success.
There is something else that lies between failure and success, that makes it work.
We think failure leads to success
Everyone in the world fails.
Everyone!
But not everyone succeeds.
So it is not failure that leads to success.
There is something else that lies between failure and success, that makes it work.
Failure + Reflection = Success
After failure, if we sit down and ask
"What is it that I now know, that I didn't back then?"
"What is it that I believed to be true back then, that I know now isn't"
That is when we set ourselves up for success.
Else it's just another setback!
After failure, if we sit down and ask
"What is it that I now know, that I didn't back then?"
"What is it that I believed to be true back then, that I know now isn't"
That is when we set ourselves up for success.
Else it's just another setback!
Bitter Truth #6
We do not measure progress
If I asked you to go to the gym everyday, but there were no mirrors, no weighing machines and no measuring tapes that you could ever use, you most certainly would give up, EVEN IF you were making progress!
We need to see progress!
We do not measure progress
If I asked you to go to the gym everyday, but there were no mirrors, no weighing machines and no measuring tapes that you could ever use, you most certainly would give up, EVEN IF you were making progress!
We need to see progress!
Set up your life in a way where you document, experience and witness your progress.
You will never need motivation ever again!
You will never need motivation ever again!
Bitter Truth #7
We do not try to find out why we feel what we feel.
If we feel something we do not wish to feel (anger, jealousy, hatred, sadness), our reaction is to attempt to stop the emotion.
But we cannot stop emotions.
We can only understand them.
We do not try to find out why we feel what we feel.
If we feel something we do not wish to feel (anger, jealousy, hatred, sadness), our reaction is to attempt to stop the emotion.
But we cannot stop emotions.
We can only understand them.
Ask yourself
"Why am I feeling angry/sad/jealous/hate...?"
Make a list of all possible options.
Find a pattern over time.
The next time it happens, you will know WHY you are feeling that.
In that very moment, the awareness of it, will make the emotion go away.
It is magic!
"Why am I feeling angry/sad/jealous/hate...?"
Make a list of all possible options.
Find a pattern over time.
The next time it happens, you will know WHY you are feeling that.
In that very moment, the awareness of it, will make the emotion go away.
It is magic!
Bitter Truth #8
We know others through their actions.
We know ourselves through our thoughts.
We often find ourselves asking "how is it not obvious to them, if its obvious to me?"
Because they do not know our thoughts.
They only know us because of what we have done/said.
We know others through their actions.
We know ourselves through our thoughts.
We often find ourselves asking "how is it not obvious to them, if its obvious to me?"
Because they do not know our thoughts.
They only know us because of what we have done/said.
Ask often
"What is it that they know, that I do not?"
Not with the intent of agreeing with them.
Instead with the intent of making yourself aware of their thoughts.
"What is it that they know, that I do not?"
Not with the intent of agreeing with them.
Instead with the intent of making yourself aware of their thoughts.
Bitter Truth #9
We think decisions are irreversible
Most decisions, in our head, cannot be changed.
So we spend an inordinate amount of time trying to take "the right decision".
Most decisions in life are reversible.
Worst case, we can always go back to where we started from.
We think decisions are irreversible
Most decisions, in our head, cannot be changed.
So we spend an inordinate amount of time trying to take "the right decision".
Most decisions in life are reversible.
Worst case, we can always go back to where we started from.
Ironically, our need to take the right decision becomes the hindrance to take a decision.
Bitter Truth #10
We seek comfort
Every product and service in the world is designed for our comfort.
So it tricks us into believing that life's purpose is to be comfortable.
But, the ones we look upto or want to be, are on a daily basis choosing the path of maximum resistance.
We seek comfort
Every product and service in the world is designed for our comfort.
So it tricks us into believing that life's purpose is to be comfortable.
But, the ones we look upto or want to be, are on a daily basis choosing the path of maximum resistance.
Happiness with discomfort is when we change our orbit in life.
While growing up, I always thought I have the ability to see everything that there is to know.
So I will win!
Today, I know that just as important, if not more, is to know what things I never see.
My blind spots.
These blind spots prevent us from 100% awareness.
So I will win!
Today, I know that just as important, if not more, is to know what things I never see.
My blind spots.
These blind spots prevent us from 100% awareness.
These 10 bitter truths are some of my blind spots that I have uncovered over years.
And I hope through this thread you are able to, as well.
And I hope through this thread you are able to, as well.
We all have a blind spot and its shaped exactly like us.
- Junot Diaz
- Junot Diaz
