I feel like when we talk about BPD, we talk about manipulation a lot when their actions could be perceived that way (for instance: threatening suicide), but the intention is to express an emotional response as opposed to getting what they want.

And I say this as someone w/o it.

I was raised by someone with BPD, have had & do have friends with the disorder, and have looked a lot into it to better understand that parent.

It's not that the action is right (it still is unhealthy & must be worked through), but they're just expressing deep emotions.

That expression is then extremely demonized, much like other Cluster B Personality Disorders, and create a major stigma around the individual.

Which makes their literal symptom of constantly wondering if all their actions are manipulation x10 worse.

Like, many people who struggle with BPD also struggle with identifying what manipulation is -- from others or themselves -- in what often ends up being a self sabotaging way.

They could see manipulation where there isn't any in others, and do the same w/ themselves --

-- constantly scared they're manipulating people into loving them, staying, or fearing them.

Literally blaming their own actions & everything about their relationships on themselves.

I'm not a medical professional so like this is just
unwarranted venting on the web

But I really do think it's time we discuss what manipulation is & how intent matters more than the action itself, or every emotional expression would be considered manipulation.

And with us starting with people with BPD, other Cluster B's, and even certain zodiacs (looking at Water Signs), and blanketly saying "you're emotional & manipulative, you use tears to manipulate people," is incredibly fucking harmful.