You thought I gave up, didn't you, fucker. Well, joke's on me, I really am that stubborn. Not only am I gonna eat a tube of crickets, I'm gonna eat a tube of *dessert crickets*. Enter: Orange Creamsicle

This thread sponsored by the @madiisoriginal Science Awareness Campaign. Did you know that science has explained why you feel more and more like a crab every day? Carcinization. Look it up.

(previous here: https://twitter.com/LagodaBrian/status/1367665243665666055)

When I first opened this box, I assumed the sweet ones would be the worst. Honestly, I'm not sure I still assume any such thing. Maybe I'll really be into sweet crickets. Savoring my last few moments of hope before I open this thing and have to confront reality.

(Fun fact: I actually love creamsicles; when I was growing up, they were one of my favorite mass-market frozen snacks.)

Okay, going in. As ever, it doesn't really smell like much.

The powder all settled on top. I think this is probably good, but it's very different.

Okay, honestly? Favorite so far. Bar is on the floor here, but I'm not mad yet, and that's something.

This definitely confirms my original instinct that the problem with these things was insufficient flavor powder. Now that I actually have to dig through a block of orange flavor, i really don't mind the crickets that come out.

I still hate these fucking tubes though.

Okay, so I should be actually reacting to this flavor, sorry, i got distracted by the distinct absence of total misery. So: doesn't remind me especially of creamsicle, but *does* taste like orange candy, and is even a little tangy if i scoop up too much powder.

I don't feel scammed, wrt creamsicle vs orange, but am a little mystified; just plain orange would have been much less scary. Wonder if the state of florida has outlawed that or some bullshit

Gave up and poured it out. Honestly, not eating the fuckers out of the tube is such an improvement that it's probably worth the mess. There's gotta be something better.

Okay, so having made it halfway through a tube that i'd describe as "manageably offensive", I'll say that I'm starting to suspect that this brand is an op. I think they want to convince me that crickets are bad

There are interesting and exciting bug-incorporating recipes, which I can only imagine are at least a little bit thankful for the fact that they include bugs. This is... not that. They're just blasting crickets with flavor; it lives or dies on how much powder sticks.

The message here is clear: crickets are bad, but we can help you. A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. It's the fucking vodka-sprite of crickets. At this point even if I do stumble into one I find genuinely tasty, I'm gonna be suspicious.

Why don't I feel that way about doritos? Easy. I have already had tasty preparations of corn. Nobody needs to show me that corn is good, and that means I'm much less afraid that somebody's trying to pull one over on me when they blast corn with delicious, delicious flavors.

Honestly, though, I think this is pretending to a level of honor that I don't possess. If these little shits tasted like doritos, I wouldn't even still be doing this thread because I'd've eaten them all by now.