I spent years convinced I was the needy, emotional, unhinged friend.

In actuality, I was just surrounded by people who (1) didn& #39;t know how to set boundaries, and (2) were so emotionally inaccessible, anyone feeling their feelings around them was automatically a threat.

Of course you& #39;re going to look cuckoo-for-cocoa-puffs to people who aren& #39;t in touch with their emotions.

Of course you& #39;re going to seem threatening to people who don& #39;t know how to protect and declare their own feelings, space, needs, desires.

You& #39;re going to seem anxious to someone who is committed to avoiding emotional disclosure.

You& #39;re going to seem anxious to someone who doesn& #39;t know how to set boundaries around those disclosures.

Because feelings become inherently threatening.

You are not the unhinged friend for noticing someone& #39;s avoidance and naming it.

You are not the unhinged friend for having emotions and disclosing them.

You are not the unhinged friend for not knowing someone else& #39;s boundaries when they weren& #39;t set to begin with.

Reminder: You can& #39;t meet needs that others aren& #39;t naming. You can& #39;t abide by boundaries someone refuses to set until after the fact. You can& #39;t honor someone else& #39;s emotional experiences if they aren& #39;t willing to disclose them.

You& #39;re not "too much."

Maybe the people around you are just too unskilled to set appropriate boundaries and communicate them to you. https://abs.twimg.com/emoji/v2/... draggable="false" alt="🧐" title="Gesicht mit Monokel" aria-label="Emoji: Gesicht mit Monokel">

Maybe their discomfort and avoidance of emotional disclosure... is just their shit?