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homestuck epilogues prologue thread before i lose my nerve LETS GO
HES 23??????? GOD NO NOT ALLOWED
i just started and already the plot of whats going on is so convoluted i'm fucking confused </3
girl help </3
GIRL HELP </3
SHIT WHICH ONE DO I START WITH??? (i don't wanna choose bc i don't wanna be doing this but also help)
the,,,, the meat is raw as fuck,,,,,,, what,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, (nervously) here we fucking go i guess,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
you cant tell me this is canon. NO. YOURE NOT ALLOWED. /lh
this is so incredibly fucking surreal i cant believe it. what? what???
famous last words
glad to see that karkat and i are on the same page here
THE MAYOR??? IS FUCKING DEAD????? IM DISTRAUGHT, NOBODY TOUCH ME
god damn it dave!!!!!!!!!
ok but let me just 
real quick
real quick
proud of him!! but also that sounds like a freaking NIGHTMARE
i'm the croc
yeah dirk!!!! what the fuck dude!!!! you deserve better!!!!!!!!
this... doesn't sound like dirk at all? what?? he was so much more genuine in homestuck, he's just spouting horseshit here???
im about to throw hands
jake started rapping and i immediately changed tabs NO THANKS I DONT THINK I CAN HANDLE THIS
H
dirk just. casually whipping out a tranquillizer and using it on jake to shut him up i am. What The Fuck also Why Did I Laugh.
jake my beloved <3
no :( stop :((
wh. what does this mean.
oh god oh fuck i am filled with Concern,
i want to seeee my little boyyy HERE HE COMES
SKJHFDGKAFSDAK I MEAN MOOD?????
woah nelly there are too many words on this here page. if you think i'm doing anything more than skimming this shit you are insane. /lh
jane????? is xenophobic as fuck????????
he means the world to me, you need to understand this
NO SHIT SHERLOCK!!!!!!! /lh
I FULLY SUPPORT YOU BEGINNING TO UNDERSTAND YOUR MENTAL HEALTH SO THAT YOU CAN BEGIN TO GET THE HELP THAT YOU NEED BUT I REALLY DON'T THINK THAT THIS IS THE TIME-
NO YOU CANNOT ACTUALLY BE TELLING ME THAT ALL THE TIMES THE TROLLS ATE "GRUBSAUCE" OR WHAT HAVE YOU THAT THEY WERE ACTUALLY EATING BABY TROLLS. YOU CANNOT. /lh
UGHHHHHH NO I DONT *WANT* TO BE VRISKA
hussie really said fuck jakes personality i'm just gonna replace that with his ass and its making me very >:(((((
goddamnit. i regret starting this.
SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. JANE DECIDES TO SEDUCE JAKE TO GET HIM ON HER SIDE IN THE ELECTION AND THEN WE FIND OUT THAT IT WAS *DIRK'S* IDEA??????? AND JAKE STILL LOVES HIM AND HE FUCKING *KNOWS* BECAUSE OF HIS ASPECT, THATS SO FUCKED UP???????????
NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS ARE BEING DONE JUSTICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
davepeta <3333
iconic
uhhhhh.......
ORANGE TEXT HI I'M STARTING TO GET WORRIED
I HAVE A FEELING I KNOW WHATS GOING ON AND I DONT LIKE IT ONE BIT
the fuckign.
WALLET.
WALLET.
AS THEY SHOULD BE, FUCK YEAH ROXY !!!
where did daves entire obsession with the economy come from i mean i get it but wow hussie good job picking one singular thing abt a character and dulling them down to that One Specific Thing
HDFGKJAFSKLJ
"ok"
bless thank you kanaya, at least i can rely on u
dirk. dirk. what the fuck are you doing. Dirk. D I R K.
hurgles angrily in the general direction of hussie
dave?????? what the fuck is even going on anymore
i'm LOST!!!!! LOST I SAY!!!!!!!
HELL YEAH JAKE!!! this man is the only mfer i respect rn
fuck off dirk
"SHUT UP"
"word"
their DYNAMIC
"word"
their DYNAMIC
HELL YEAH JAKEOTHY
uh
i dont think
i dont think that that's very healthy
i dont think
i dont think that that's very healthy
god..... vrisrezi........
did john...... just lose his virginity in his dads car at the edge of a motherfucking black hole...........
i'm just gonna gloss over that because what the fuck. anyways why are dirk and dave fighting over control of the narrative so funny?
dirk is no transphobe, you fiend (hussie)
WHAT. NO??? NOT AT ALL. NOPE. DIRK WOULD NEVER, FUCK YOU HUSS*E
lmfao
dave 
shrek
comparing shit with layers to onions
shrekcomparing shit with layers to onions
fuck, dirks back in control of the narrative. Concern.
ok but i never actually thought about john and terezi that much but..... hm............
no not like this... fuck im just upset rn this is hhhhhhhg..... this isn't dirk anymore this is just some asshole using the people around him for his own personal gains........ why am i doing this to myself :(
dirk just constantly misgendering roxy is so upsetting, he Knows what their pronouns are and he's just Refusing To Use Them. what happened to the dude who said that roxy was the best person he knew???? i honestly cannot link them together they're so different.
:OOOO ROXY HE/THEY SO TRUE???? GOOD FOR HIM!!!!! GOOD FOR HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!
HE BROKE UP THE LESBIANS??????????????? I HATE IT HERE. I HATE IT HERE!!!!!!!!!!
dirk what the fuck
i hate it here but this is so fucking funny
god fucking damn it dirk. youre ruining everything for me.
NONE OF THIS MEANS ANYTHING TO ME IF HES JUST NUDGING IT IN PLACE.
lmfao THEYRE TOO THICKHEADED EVEN FOR YOU DIRK HA SUCK ON IT!!!!!!!!!!
JUST GIVE UP MAN THEYRE TOO DUMB FOR YOU KDJFGSHAKS
HELL YEAH DAVE TELL THIS ASSHOLE JUST WHERE HE CAN FUCK OFF TO
hes so ridiculous, i love this dumbass
i'm just so angry and upset rn... not-dirk YOU did this,,, YOURE causing him all this distress and for what???? to stroke your overly-large ego????????? :(
NO NO DONT YOU FUCKING DARE YOURE JUST DOING THIS TO WRECK HIS SELF CONFIDENCE OH MY GOD YOU CANT DO THIS YOU DONT EVEN HAVE A HEART ANYMORE AS FAR AS IM CONCERNED
"heâs scared. no, terrified. of being left with no one who truly cares for him." fuck off not-dirk how fucking dare you purposefully make someone that scared i am FUMING, BEING ALONE SUCKS!!!!!! WHY THE HELL WAS THIS NECESSARY??????????
THANK YOU JADE!!!!!!!!
FUCKIGN K A R K A T LMFAO
trying to distract myself w how much i love these dudes to try and stop myself from thinking abt jake crying all alone </3
THEYRE SO STUPID I LOVE THEM <3
D A V E B O T??? SO SOON????????
okay what the fuck is the postscript what do i do NOW
OH FUCK
AJKSDHDKAKAFSD YEAH. YEAH YOU HAVE BEEN, GAMZ.
brb while i sob my eyes out over how happy i am that the lesbians are back together <3 ROSEMARY I MISSED YOUUUU <333
jade. what are you doing, my friend.
YELL HEAH JADE YOU TELL HIM!! WE DONT SLUTSHAME ON EARTH C, HAHA B I T C H
jake, my beloved
"sometimes jake simply cannot be blamed for the foolish things he does. after all, he literally grew up in the woods." HELP I LOVE HIM SO M UU C H
oh jake :(((((
im so :(
"jake english was kind of a slut, true," HGSJHKZJFSD OKAY SAY IT LIKE IT IS JANE LMFAOOOO
HES SO OBLIVIOUS WHAT A DUDE, WHAT A DUDE
me too, dude, me too.
STOPPP THEYRE ADOPTING A GRUB TOGETHER THIS IS ADORABLEEEE
WHY THE FUCK WAS ANY OF THIS NECESSARY IS WHAT I WANT TO KNOW
lmfao
dave why do you need to make every conversation about sexuality so fucking weird
dave :(((((
jake no.... you deserve to be happy, dont just go along with this to make her happy...... :((((((
THIS IS SO UPSETTING!!! ALL OF THIS!!!!!
NO!!!!!!!!!! I KNOW WHATS COMING AND I DONT WANT ANY OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HHHHHHHHHHHHHH DIRK IS DEADDDDD I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT HERE SO MUCH WHY THE FUCKKKK
DECAPITATED???? AGAIN?????? IM JUSt. IM IN FUCKING PIECES. THIS SUCKS THIS SUCKS SO BAD I THINK I MIGHT ACTUALLY START SOBBING
i. am not okay. and im not sure that i ever will be again.
"dirk taught me so much shit i didnt know i needed from him" STOPPP IM IN CLASS AND IM IN TEARS
I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT HERE
JANE COMFORT JAKE YOU ASS, HES NOT REAL SO I CANT!!!!!
oh my fucking god i love him so much
ok john n roxy are real cute nd all but ????? what happened. this is moving so fast.
ROXY IS PREGNANT?
J A N E I S D A T I N G G A M Z E E ????????
I LOVE THEM SO SO MUCH
what. i thought yall were joking.
im going to cry,,, JOHN,,,, he doesnt know whats wrong just that something IS,,,,,
jane,, do you hear yourself
DUDE EVEN THE CLOWN CAN SEE IT
NOOO RIGHT IN FRONT OF JAKE??? :(
im crying. im crying. im crying.
hes so sad and lonely and he feels swept aside by the one person he was trying to make happy... god im just. jake :(
this sucks so much :( so so much :(((((((((( i dont like ittt
dave i love you so so much
SIBLINGS <333
JAKE IS THE REAL MVP HERE I SEE YOU HELPING ROXY THERE EVERYONE ELSE MIGHT NOT BUT I SEE YOU YOU GOOD PERSON YOU <3
>:OOOOOOOOO
NONONONONO I THOUGH COMMANDER KARKAT WAS AN ALTERNATE TIMELINE THING FROM HOMESTUCK 2 YOU CANT TELL ME THAT THIS IS THE DAVE THAT BECOMES DAVEBOT IM GOING TO CRY FUCK CANDY JADE IM SO SAD RN
sir what the fuck
john misses terezi :(((( ME TOO ME TOO
IS JOHN GOING TO FUCKING KIDNAP TAVROS FUCKING CROCKER
dave i love you so so so much
dave youre perfect just the way you are dont ever believe otherwise
IM GOING TO SOB JAKE DOESNT DESERVE THIS SHIT HE DESERVES THE WORLD THIS IS SO FREAKING SAD
i am crying for this child. HES FIVE AND HES MISERABLE.
HAS JANE FUCKING FORCED JAKE INTO A KISMESISSITUDE. IS THAT WHAT HAS HAPPENED HERE. IM GOING TO FUCKING CRY JAAAAAAAAAKE ;-;
COMMANDER KARKAT!!!!!
oh my god
he still has the speaker crab im going to sob this is all so sad i hate this
MEENAH MY BELOVED <3333333
oh no n on ono onon onononononononononono nononononoononononononononono
this is hitting me hard in the not feeling real disease i am very unhappy rn
oh my god NOOOO KARKAT AND MEENAH ARE TOGETHER?????? NOOOOOOO BOOOOOOOOO :(
commander karkat with an eyepatch........... gender fucking envy
JADE AND DAVE WEDDING I HATE THIS I HATE THIS SO MUCH NOOOOOOO
this is awful this is so awful
JOHN STILL HAS TEREZIS PICTURE IN HIS WALLET I
GOD
HHHHHHHHHHH
GOD
HHHHHHHHHHH
hhhhhhhhh :(((
the real vriska is back. everyone i care about is severely unhappy or dead. this is the worst possible timeline.
im furious.
SHE JUST FUCKING THREATENED TO KILL ALL OF THE TROLLS GAMZEE YES SHE IS XENOPHOBIC
jake... ;-;
IT WELL AND TRULY DOES.
vriska is beating up gamzee and im on her side for once. oh how the turns have tabled.
NONONONONONONONO REGRET REGRET REGRET I HATE IT I HATE THIS SO MUCH VRISKA NOOOOOOOO I THOUGHT YOU HAD AN OUNCE OF COMMON SENSE-
lmfao john just noped out of there so fast dude i respect you
did he finally leave. AND HE TOOK TAVROS WITH HIM. THANK GOD THIS IS THE FIRST GOOD THING TO HAVE HAPPENED.
im going to break down if john refuses to help jake. that is a promise.
oh jake :((((((((
yeah i get you :( but i dont have to be happy about it :(((
this thread is dead and then suddenly jake is in a scene and i lose my mind. ANYWAYS LOOK AT HIM I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HES SO HAPPY HES LITERALLY GLOWING <3333333
