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20 more life lessons every father must teach his son
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1. Your family is the most important business you’ll ever run
Successful businesses have a vision. They have a mission and values. You’d never start a business without diligence and intention. And you'd never start without the right partner. Why would your family be different?
Successful businesses have a vision. They have a mission and values. You’d never start a business without diligence and intention. And you'd never start without the right partner. Why would your family be different?
2. Truth is the highest virtue
Truth is objective. There are laws of nature and rules to life. Success isn't an accident, it's an algorithm. If you prefer a subjective view of truth, eventually you'll be lying to yourself. Seek the truth, speak it always, and guard it fiercely.
Truth is objective. There are laws of nature and rules to life. Success isn't an accident, it's an algorithm. If you prefer a subjective view of truth, eventually you'll be lying to yourself. Seek the truth, speak it always, and guard it fiercely.
3. Take advice selectively
Most advice is bad. People give advice freely on subjects they know little about. Or they'll project, telling you what they would have wanted to hear. But occasionally you’ll find someone who truly has what you want. That’s the advice to listen to.
Most advice is bad. People give advice freely on subjects they know little about. Or they'll project, telling you what they would have wanted to hear. But occasionally you’ll find someone who truly has what you want. That’s the advice to listen to.
4. Never complain
There is nothing more pitiful than a man who complains. When something doesn’t go your way, ask yourself this question: “Do I have the power to change it?” If yes, take action to change it. If no, accept your situation and move on. But never, ever complain.
There is nothing more pitiful than a man who complains. When something doesn’t go your way, ask yourself this question: “Do I have the power to change it?” If yes, take action to change it. If no, accept your situation and move on. But never, ever complain.
5. Familiarity breeds contempt
People become tired of behavior they can predict. This fatigue leads to boredom, and boredom is one step removed from resentment. Do not be flaky, and do not be erratic. But do indulge in a bit of mystery now and then. Your peers will thank you.
People become tired of behavior they can predict. This fatigue leads to boredom, and boredom is one step removed from resentment. Do not be flaky, and do not be erratic. But do indulge in a bit of mystery now and then. Your peers will thank you.
6. Never make excuses
Excuses are cheap, that’s why everyone has them. Taking responsibility is hard. Looking at yourself objectively and owning your shortcomings is a feat of humility most men never master. And that’s exactly why you should do it.
Excuses are cheap, that’s why everyone has them. Taking responsibility is hard. Looking at yourself objectively and owning your shortcomings is a feat of humility most men never master. And that’s exactly why you should do it.
7. Never gossip
A man doesn’t gossip. A man doesn’t trust another man who gossips. If someone is comfortable speaking openly about the private affairs of another, they’d be comfortable doing the same to you. Run far away from gossipers. Your reputation depends on it.
A man doesn’t gossip. A man doesn’t trust another man who gossips. If someone is comfortable speaking openly about the private affairs of another, they’d be comfortable doing the same to you. Run far away from gossipers. Your reputation depends on it.
8. Gratitude is an action
Gratitude is not a platitude. It’s an actionable cognitive technique you can use to improve your happiness. Tell the people in your life you’re grateful for them. Show them. Express your gratitude for your life in thought, word, and deed. Every day.
Gratitude is not a platitude. It’s an actionable cognitive technique you can use to improve your happiness. Tell the people in your life you’re grateful for them. Show them. Express your gratitude for your life in thought, word, and deed. Every day.
9. People aren’t interested in your problems
If you have present and engaged parents, share your setbacks with them. A brother or dear friend will also do. Find aligned men within whom to confide. But bring your problems to the broader world? You'll likely be met with contempt.
If you have present and engaged parents, share your setbacks with them. A brother or dear friend will also do. Find aligned men within whom to confide. But bring your problems to the broader world? You'll likely be met with contempt.
10. Women want a man with options
Women want a socially valuable man on a mission, who is likely to fulfill his ambitions and aptitudes. She wants a man who could have anyone, but wants her. Are you wondering how to attract women? Start by becoming this type of man.
Women want a socially valuable man on a mission, who is likely to fulfill his ambitions and aptitudes. She wants a man who could have anyone, but wants her. Are you wondering how to attract women? Start by becoming this type of man.
11. Don’t waste a woman’s time
It is selfish to prolong a relationship with a woman who is interested in starting a family while you’re not ready. If you want different things, it's honorable to move on and let her find what she desires.
It is selfish to prolong a relationship with a woman who is interested in starting a family while you’re not ready. If you want different things, it's honorable to move on and let her find what she desires.
12. How you look matters
Your posture is your first impression. Your body composition is your second. What you’re wearing is your third. Don't listen when people say "only what’s inside counts". Your appearance will open doors, your value will take you across the threshold.
Your posture is your first impression. Your body composition is your second. What you’re wearing is your third. Don't listen when people say "only what’s inside counts". Your appearance will open doors, your value will take you across the threshold.
13. Do what you say
You’re only as good as your word. A man who says he’ll do a thing and doesn’t deliver will never have the respect of other valuable men. If you can’t deliver, don’t promise it. If you’re unsure, set expectations appropriately. Under-promise always.
You’re only as good as your word. A man who says he’ll do a thing and doesn’t deliver will never have the respect of other valuable men. If you can’t deliver, don’t promise it. If you’re unsure, set expectations appropriately. Under-promise always.
14. You are your circle
Your associations speak more loudly than your actions. Nothing carries further in the eyes of the general public than the stench of bad company. You are the average of your five closest friends. And other people will notice who they are, I guarantee it.
Your associations speak more loudly than your actions. Nothing carries further in the eyes of the general public than the stench of bad company. You are the average of your five closest friends. And other people will notice who they are, I guarantee it.
15. You get what you ask for
If you don’t ask for it, you’ll never get it. Advocate for yourself, or you’ll never get what you want, much less what you deserve. "Ask, and it shall be given to you." The world gives graciously to the bold, but a closed mouth doesn’t get fed.
If you don’t ask for it, you’ll never get it. Advocate for yourself, or you’ll never get what you want, much less what you deserve. "Ask, and it shall be given to you." The world gives graciously to the bold, but a closed mouth doesn’t get fed.
16. Don’t waste the easy times
Life will throw you difficulties. When things are calm, use that time wisely. Prepare, create, build yourself up. Gather what you will need to outlast the winter. Because you don't rise to the occasion, you fall to the level of your preparation.
Life will throw you difficulties. When things are calm, use that time wisely. Prepare, create, build yourself up. Gather what you will need to outlast the winter. Because you don't rise to the occasion, you fall to the level of your preparation.
17. You get what you give
What you get out is what you put in. You can have all the blessings in the world, but without action they won’t get you very far. The world operates based on value. Create value for others or your value is near zero. No it isn't fair. Yes it's reality.
What you get out is what you put in. You can have all the blessings in the world, but without action they won’t get you very far. The world operates based on value. Create value for others or your value is near zero. No it isn't fair. Yes it's reality.
18. Don’t waste time on embarrassment
Nobody is thinking about you nearly as much as you’re thinking about yourself. You will commit faux pas of varying severity. Simply learn from them and move on. Be comforted that most people are too busy worrying about themselves to care.
Nobody is thinking about you nearly as much as you’re thinking about yourself. You will commit faux pas of varying severity. Simply learn from them and move on. Be comforted that most people are too busy worrying about themselves to care.
19. Tailor your words to your audience
Every person you meet will have a different communication style. Some are blunt, some are subtle. Some are serious, some are gregarious. Success requires speaking to people in their preferred manner, not yours. Meet them where they are.
Every person you meet will have a different communication style. Some are blunt, some are subtle. Some are serious, some are gregarious. Success requires speaking to people in their preferred manner, not yours. Meet them where they are.
20. Look out for yourself first
The best way to change the world, to truly help people, is to make yourself great. You can affect very little from a position of powerlessness. To become powerful you must become valuable, and this will require selfishness. And that's OK.
The best way to change the world, to truly help people, is to make yourself great. You can affect very little from a position of powerlessness. To become powerful you must become valuable, and this will require selfishness. And that's OK.
Save Your Sons is on a mission to end fatherlessness. To do that, we are giving young men the tools they need to approach the creation and direction of their families intentionally.
You can join in by clicking the link in our bio and subscribing to our email list.
You can join in by clicking the link in our bio and subscribing to our email list.
I also invite you to follow our new account, @FathersQuotes - where you'll find daily wisdom on the joys of life, fatherhood, and family.
Thank you as always for reading!
Thank you as always for reading!
20 more life lessons can be found here: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1341760898709512194?s=20
A thread containing actionable critical thinking exercises for you and your kids is here: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1345787962307604482?s=20
Your family is your business. This thread teaches leadership qualities a father can master and model for his children as they grow: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1364628881953738755?s=20
20 traits of great fathers
Master these so you can pass them down to your family: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1365700209825771523
Master these so you can pass them down to your family: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1365700209825771523
How to be wealthy and happy, in 16 steps: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1372212120285220866?s=20
Your freedom begins the day you realize your freedom is in your own hands: https://twitter.com/SaveYourSons/status/1395519980767268866?s=20
