I'm watching the Shawn Mendes Concert film right now and I'm literally in tears.
Ever since I was 16 or 17 I went to multiple concerts each year, they're my short escape from reality, my happy place and something I could always look forward to.

This year should've been the same

I should've seen so many of my favorite artists.
Should've made so many great memories and met so many people.

Corona took all of that away from me. That huge part of my life was gone, just like that and the worst part is not knowing when I'll get it back.

And it's not just the

concert itself, it's getting the tickets, planning the journey, the excitement when the date comes closer, laying awake in bed the night before not being able to sleep, getting up at ungodly hours, arriving at the venue, spending the day queuing with my favorite people and

strangers I just met, blasting the music through my music box, getting even more excited with every hour passing by, the excitement when the doors finally open, the rush entering the venue, waiting for the show to start, screaming at the top off my lungs when the lights go out,

singing and dancing along without a fucking care in the world, being emotional and physically exhausted afterwards, struggling to stay awake in the train home, finally getting home.

I miss all of this and so many more things more than anything and it hurts so fucking much.