Relationships aren't always easy. These are tips that I find myself commonly reiterating to myself, friends and/or clients. Just thought I'd share them:

Too much reassurance seeking isn't healthy and is counterproductive to your insecurity. It just fuels an anxiety cycle and only provides short-term relief. It can also be exhausting to the person providing reassurance and make them feel like their efforts are ineffective.

Notice and challenge the negative beliefs you have of yourself/the world. "I don't deserve love", "all men cheat", "women just want money". When we don't notice them, we unknowingly and unfairly project them onto romantic partners.

Notice your bad moods and don't project them onto your partner. Realising that you're in low spirits and mentioning it can help. "I had a terrible day at work today it's left me in a bad mood, I'm just gonna take time to cool off so I don't unknowingly get antsy with you".

Be mindful of the space you ask for. It can worry your partner so let them know why. If it takes longer than usual, send updates: "hey hope you're well, thanks for respecting the space I asked for, still clearing my head but I can't wait until we can spend time together again".

Realise when you introduce uncertainty. Uncertainty is inevitable but can be a big trigger. Be as clear about what you are certain and uncertain about and offer empathy. "I don't mean to throw you off but I can't commit to that right now, I'll update you when my schedule clears"

Continuous effort helps. Date nights and spending time on joint hobbies maintains your bond. Along with continuous expressions of love. It can also be stress relieving.

Check in with your partner. If you notice their mood is off or you just have a general desire for understanding something, ask and don't assume. "I noticed you've been quite low in energy and aren't as responsive, is everything okay? Have I done something to offend you?"

Take time to appreciate the "unnoticeable" things (e.g. the time/money your partner sets aside to see you and the effort they put into looking good/arranging things etc).

Communicate your needs directly and clearly instead of expecting them to be automatically known. E.g. "may I have a hug please?", "I'm feeling stressed, can I just vent and be listened to please?"

Have hard conversations in good conditions. If there's a serious matter to discuss, bring it up when all the person's needs are met. Don't do it when they're prone to being irritable e.g. after a hard day at work, when they're hungry/tired etc.

Give the benefit of the doubt about your partner's intentions, ask when unsure. Instead of "you're always so dismissive", say "what did you mean when you said that?", "that seemed like a dismissive thing to say, is that how you meant it?"

Some of these things are really basic and obvious, some are less so. Hope this helps!