I’ve read an article on how your brain can get addicted to misfortune. Like how it seeks the next bad thing just to feel validated. That’s why it feels like a hopeless situation. Also it’s dawns on you how it might get worse every time and how much more tired you are about it
And I can definitely feel the downward spiral. It’s like how you get angry about yourself getting angry.

Just with time you care less and less about the fact to try harder to get out of the spiral. I’m just so confused how there are so many people who think being alive is fun.
Thinking about it, it’s probably my own fault for thinking about it so much. Trying to find a way out of this mud but somehow there is just no way.
Ultimately, everyone is in sum the same amount of happy and unhappy just, it’s just perspective. And for some it’s hard to change-
Persepective.

Seeing friends hustling along everyday, I’m always confused where they want to go to?
What are you aiming at?
Do you want to fulfill your materialistic needs? Is that all in the end? Though retail therapy makes you more addicted to buying things to fill the void.
Then thinking more about it you feel stupid and useless, hopeless and numb but there is just not a whole lot life force to make go and do something worthwhile
Coz also us pessimistic folk doesn’t want to experience new things coz it’ll go downhill after some time and then you -
Feel even worse because your negative brain got validated again how things are just never going to end well.

Fear of experiencing sth bad.
It’s interesting how some get off facing knew challenges and grow and how some who try to avoid feeling negative and stop facing anything.
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