why the statement "nobody cares that you dont wanna have sex" is aphobic, a short educational thread made by someone who's actually asexual

1. it reduces asexuality down to not wanting to have sex when that's not what asexuality is. someone who's asexual experience little to no sexual attraction and that's all it is. yes some of us are sex repulse but remember that not all of us are

2. it generalizes all asexuals. just because some of us arent intrested in sex doesnt mean all of us are. some aces do have sex, whether it's because they want to have children, feel closer to they're s/o or just because they like it.

yes, aces can like having sex. as i mentioned in my first point, not all of us are sex repulsed

3. it's not even true. some of you may not even realize how allonormative society. it's assumed that sex is something everyone wants and it's part of what makes us human and if you're not interested in it there must be something inherently wrong with you

i would like to clarify that sex isnt a bad thing (just in case someone interprets it the wrong way) but often times generalized statements like make aces feel like they're broken. it's something i and many others struggle with.

and it's not just an internal issue we deal with, because believe it or not aces are shunned for not wanting to have sex. the next part of this thread is going to be a bit triggering and if you want to skip over it it's completely understandable. just go to the 4th point

tw // aphobia , rape , medicalization

if nobody truly cared about aces not wanting to have sex, then so many aces wouldnt have to go through corrective rape or be pressured into it. if nobody cared that aces dont want to have sex it wouldnt be considered as a sexual dysfunction

tw // aphobia , medicalization

up until 2013 asexuality was considered a sexual function in the dsm (dubbed as hsdd, which shares a lot of characteristics with asexuality). nowadays, if someone identifies as asexual they wont be diagnosed with hsdd

tw // aphobia , medicalization

but if someone were to be ace and not be aware of it they'd still be diagnosed which brings us back to square one.

more on this mentioned here: http://www.asexualityarchive.com/asexuality-in-the-dsm-5/

tw // aphobia

many people will still consider us "immature" or "innocent" for not wanting to have sex. we're told we're too young to be sure and that we havent met the right person yet, when really this is who we are. and we dont need someone to fix us for it

4. notice how this statement is always used to shut us down? we're never able to speak about our experiences without someone saying that "no one cares that you dont wanna fuck." it's extremely invalidating, flat out ignores the issues we face and very inconsiderate

some of yall refuse to educate yourself when it comes to asexuality and your ignorance only harms us in the long run. it's not hard to listen to aces when we wanna speak up about our sexuality. next time you see an ace discussing something think twice about what you're gonna say

we've reached the end of this thread. i dont think i have much more to say but please do educate yourself regarding things about asexuality. it's not hard to be open minded. https://asexuali-t.carrd.co