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I hate it when people say "You've got to leave your comfort zone" Because what they perceive as my comfort zone and what I perceive as my comfort zone are two very different things.
When they say that, they want me to do something big and social. They usually mean things like /1
When they say that, they want me to do something big and social. They usually mean things like /1
Going to a party or another thing with lots of people. They perceive that as important. They don't understand that doing this is so far out of my comfort zone on most days it is actually harmful. It means I have to spend more spoons than I have, more energy on things that /2
don't give me anything back. No energy. No pleasant feeling afterwards. It'll leave me drained.
They say it'll get better if you do it enough. But it won't. I'll spend more than I have until I am so badly in dept that I'll burn out and go nowhere for months. /3
They say it'll get better if you do it enough. But it won't. I'll spend more than I have until I am so badly in dept that I'll burn out and go nowhere for months. /3
They don't understand that going to the supermarket or taking a different route with the car is already out of my comfort zone. They don't understand that making a phonecall is already out of my comfort zone. They don't understand that I don't get desensitized to most noises /4
They also don't seem to grasp the concept that every person has a different comfort zone. Just as every person is different, their comfort zone is different and to push them out of it before they are ready is more harmful than not. /5
However, helping people leave their comfort zone is very important. I went on a trip once with my grandma. It would have been greatly out of my comfort zone if I had been forced to do it, but I was asked, I could think about it and I could do it at my own pace. It was very /6
draining but it helped me out a lot in my life. In contrast to that I didn't go on any trips in school because I wasn't ready and refused outright. My family supported me in that. /7
Comfort zones are safe. Safe isn't bad. Safe is very important to regain energy. It is very important for people who are constantly anxious or afraid. It is very for #ActuallyAutistic #AllAutistics people who are constantly suffering from having their senses bombarded. /8
Taking that away will lead to nothing. Just because something is easy for you doesn't mean it's easy for everybody else.
Every parent knows how to ride a bike and won't ridicule their child for not knowing. It's easy for them but not for someone who has never sat on a bike. /9
Every parent knows how to ride a bike and won't ridicule their child for not knowing. It's easy for them but not for someone who has never sat on a bike. /9
Meaning: Let's be nice and understanding with each other. Let's support staying in the comfort zone for as long as a person need. They'll know when it is time to leave.
I wanted to make this thread for ages. Glad I finally managed to do so and to pinpoint why people saying it always makes me bristle so much.
