TW/Abuse

I was so stupid to log in here today because apparently we’re back to having a discourse on ‘abuse’ as if it’s sth that should be up for discussion every other day. As much as I appreciate people who were able to break away,I also know that many including myself cannot.

It doesn’t make me or people like me weak or vulnerable. I’m not devoid/undeserving of respect. We have trauma bonds, we have manipulative environment, we have financial constraints, bad mental health, co-dependency, emotional attachments that hold us back-sometimes indefinitely.

The last thing we should be having discourses about is abuse. Someone’s ability to break away does not make my lived experience, my reality,my resilience any less worthy. You don’t get to decide what’s what for me or for anybody else. It’s triggering for those of us who’re stuck.

Some of us are trying very hard to stay afloat. Let us be. People have different situations, different coping mechanisms, love for their abusers, guilt related to leaving, family members that we can’t leave behind and so many things that might not fit in your scheme of things.

Also, when we’re talking about abusive families, we must also consider that the dynamic of this relationship btw caregivers & children is very different than other relationships. It’s made out to be very sanctimonious.Some people seek comfort in the pretence of a healthy dynamic.