Tonnie Wa Juja :THE MAKING OF A CABRON

Episode 2 (NO RETREAT NO SURRENDER)

Many days, I've been in hiding!
Rent is due, dawg and I ain't got sh!t
I'm trynna learn n get a degree
But this guy wants to lock my place!
Damn I can't hide no more
Gotta find a way to cope!

JUJA, 2017.
2017 so far had been quite a year, I mean I had already mastered the art of going for days without food.I honestly thought I had seen it all, but I was wrong, I had just been introduced to what later proved to be the hardest Unit in my life, THE MAKING OF A CABRON

It's 10:45 PM, my backpack hanging from one shoulder, my legs heavy and sluggish, my stomach growling, damn I'm hungry asf!I'm from the lib, I've got a paper tomorrow morning. In my pocket I have 70 Bob, I should cook maybe, lakini itabidi niombe gasAaargh! F it, I wont cook.

I had been studying for the better part of the day, I had saved that 70 bob for a "heavy supper!". Ilikua late and I needed to wake up early, so nikachorea kupika juu ya hustle ya kuomba gas. So nikabuy Selecta juu iko na slices kibao, na kale Kablueband ka sachet..

Ilikua nifinye hio boflo teketeke alafu nidoz, niamkie kufinesse hio paper. So I made my way to my penthouse polite polite, sikua ata nasalimia watu, so unlike me, lakini nlikua nimechoka ajab.As usual kwanza nikafungua viatu, then proceeded to unlock my door. WAIT, TF!!

Mlango yangu ilikua imeekwa kifuli ingine kubwa kuliko yenye mi hufunga nayo. Finally, Mr. Caretaker had done it! I had 3 months rent arrears, but the whole time I had managed to convince him that I had a contigent plan to clear the arrears, lakini hio day akaamua ngeli ikome

I had never been locked out before, but there's a first time for everything, right? He lived in the ground floor, so nikabebana na boflo yangu nikashuka kumpiga ngeli tena. Nilimsuka for 15 minutes straight, pouring my heart out, he didn't say anything the entire time..

Vile nilimaliza jamaa aliniuliza, "Unanunua mkate na huezi lipa rent?" What?! , Jamaa alikua anadhani nimenunua boflo juu ya starehe, angejua that was my only meal of the day . I explained to him that I had an exam the next day and I couldn't afford to be late, he gave in.

Alinifungulia na akanishow, kesho nikitoka tu atafunga.So the next morning, nilitoka na kabag kamejaa nguo za hio wiki, I honestly didn't know where I was gonna spend the night on that daybut I had to figure something out.I went on and sat for the paper, it turned out alright

At this point in my campus life, I didn't have any close friend, mtu mwenye ningepull up kwake na nilale bila stress.So ilibidi nikoroge maboyz fulani wa daro tuende discussion overnight because the paper we had the next day was fire. Walikua wanaishi kwa 1BD,so tukaenda kwao

I spent that night seated on a plastic chairNikaenda nikafanya hio paper, alafu nikaenda kutafuta lunch, sikua ata na bobAt around 2pm I was tired, jua imewaka kama moyale, na sina place naeza chill, ikabidi nimeingia chuo, nikaenda kuchill Cherry Park.Struggles I tell yah!

So sitting under the shadows in the park, I started to brainstorm. I needed to find a way to make the guy open my place, la sivyo, hio siku ningelala nje kama jembe. After about 2 hours, I had come up with the perfect plan, the guy was going to dance to my tune, Lessgoo!

Caretaker alikuanga na job, he usually left at about 10AM anarudi usiku about 9PM. So I went to a friend in the same building, nikamuomba padlock, akanipea MINDY, kubwa ajab. Nikaenda kwa mlango ya caretaker, nikaongezea hio MINDY, then I went to the Lib.Fireworks coming up

9:10PM,Caretaker calling! I wanted to ask him, "did you find my package?" but I was a little bit respectful, so I told him, "nitakufungulia, ukinifungulia", then I hanged up. After 30 minutes, nikarudi kwa ploti, nilipata jamaa anawika ungedhani anauza maremare.

Akanifungulia, then nikapea beshte yangu keys aende amfungulie kwake ndio achukue padlock aniletee. To make sure sijafungiwa tena, niliseti padlock mbili, design akikam kuseti yake apate hata haiezi ingia, hakuna space. I had beat him in his own game! No retreat no surrender!

For the next two weeks that I had exams, nilikua natoka 6 ngware, alafu naingia before Caretaker arudi. Alikua anakam, anajua niko ndani but haezi fanya sh!t. But surely what was I supposed to do, sina pesa na niko na exam bana, alaa! The fun part was yet to come.

After my exams, nilikua nimefura kichwa, nikaita manzi yangu sleepover. I explained the whole situation to her before she came, but she didn't care. She was the true definition of Partner in Crime. Alikua na pesa, tukarefill gas, na tukafanya shopping for the whole weekend

So the whole weekend cycle ilikua mechi, food, movie! greatness tupuSunday night Caretaker akaona nimemsoma ufala sana, alikuja kwa mlango akaanza kushout ati ameendea msee wa welding akuje achomelee mlango tukiwa ndaniTulicheka kama mafala alafu tukapiga mechi moja hataree

I have to give it to my girl though,she had nerves of steel. Madem wengine kwa hio situweshen wangetenseCaretaker hakufanya shit, ilikua vitisho baridi, moto ya makaratasiThe next day vile alienda job, nilikam na mbogi, nikahamisha vitu zangu nikapeleka kwa beshte yangu

Nilimake sure nimeacha curtain ya mlango ndio jamaa aendelee kudhani niko area, jokes on him! Haraka upesi nikajitoa juja, nikaishia kwa bro yangu. Jamaa aligundua after 3 days, kufungua bedsitter alipata kitu inaitwa butwaa ikipiga press ups! Echo tu ndio angebongesha

Just like that nikajitoa kwa hio ngori, na ilikua december, kupatana tena ni never! adios mate! Jamaa alikua ananitafuta kama John Kiriamiti. I'm not so proud of what I did, but it's what the situation demanded! Nikiomoka nitasaka huyo jamaa nimpatie hio pesa bana.

THE MAKING OF A CABRON
2.The end justifies the means. As a cabron you must Do whatever it takes to pretect JEFE, and you... are JEFE!

Intro piece inspired by 50 Cent's Many Men.

I have a challenge for y'all, check it out . Mfanye kweli, nawatambua vibaya sana!

I know I'm not alone in this one. Kufungiwa nyumba ni kitu comrades washanormalize.

I wanna challenge you guys,

A. tag your 2 friends who you think can relate to this story!

B. Quote the first tweet of this thread utuambie story yako ya kufungiwa using the tag #TonnieWaJuja

Thanks guys for the support, we must finish this journey! Viva!

Good day maniacs! .