Riotsheds: a tragicomedy

Friends, Portlanders, Suburbanites, Lend me your ears: We come to bury the bourgeoisie (in a metal box that costs as much as a year of college), not to praise them.
These fliers are apparently being handed out in the Laurelhurst neighborhood. The website is real, and kind of awe inspiring. First: if your disaster plan involves locking yourself in a metal box with one door and no windows, our condolences: you have made a bad disaster plan.
In this thread, we hope to illustrate the ways in which Riot Sheds are not, in fact, An Realistic.
The thread was broken. Much like the dreams of a yuppie watching an antifa mob topple a $40,000 bullet-resistant human-cabinet, using only enthusiasm and truck chains. https://twitter.com/45thabsurdist/status/1330719164709781505
You can follow @45thabsurdist.
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