I am thinking about drunk bkg... He vastly overestimates how much he can drink and keeps ordering whiskeys that kirishima has to drink for him (for bkg's own good lol). He turns into this embarrassing, childish mess who clings to deku and melts all over the sofa

Deku's also a lightweight (and anyway someone has to be on kacchan-watching duty) so he sticks to sprite and follows bkg around to keep him out of trouble. Esp bc halfway through the night bkg ALWAYS decides he wants to go home and tries to wander out of the bar alone lol

Drunk bkg's pretty chill and isn't more affectionate, exactly, but he's less coordinated and doesn't care about personal space. So he'll stumble into someone and just stay there, leaning on them, until deku comes to take him away

Kirishima, to mina: so i was standing there, barbecue sauce on my ti-

Bkg, falling onto kiri's chest: ??? where'd you come from

Kiri:

Mina:

Bkg:

Kiri: you good, dude?

Bkg, still with his face mushed against kiri's pecs: you're in the way

He also steals food lol so guard your nachos because bkg will teleport towards you and have his hand halfway in the bag before you even notice he's there. Deku apologises but bkg manages to give him the slip every time. He's like an overfed dog looking for treats

Bartender: excuse me. are you, uh, deku

Deku, frantic: I'm too busy for an autograph right now sorry!!

B: sir i do not want your autograph. I want you to tell your boyfriend to stop eating leftovers

Deku: oh my god

B: he also won't stop talking about your eyes

Poor bkg... He gets very protective but also loses all braincells so it's a whole night of NOBODY MOVE, EVERYONE WHERE I CAN SEE YOU, WHERE'S KAMINARI? IS KAMINARI SAFE. I'M GONNA GO WATCH HIM. SERO NO GOING TO THE BATHROOM ALONE, TAKE IIDA WITH YOU

Bkg: where's deku

Bkg: DEKU

Bkg: guys i fucking lost deku we have to look for him before he dies

Jirou: bakugou, he is on the sofa with you. You are sitting on him

Deku, slowly suffocating to death: Hhhhhhhhh

Bkg: deku, uraraka, iida, kaminari, sero, kirishima, mina, jirou, yaomomo, me

Bkg: ok. Everyone accounted for

Iida: you forgot todoroki

Bkg: todoroki can die

Bkg:

Tdrk:

Bkg:

Tdrk:

Uraraka: what... What are they doing

Deku: staring contest

Uraraka: they're face down on the table

Deku: don't tell kacchan he thinks he's winning

Bkg: you're a shortcake

Tdrk: you're a crime brulee

Bkg: peppermint pansy

Tdrk: angry dandelion

Bkg: half and half dairy substitute ass

Tdrk: pomeranian puppy

Bkg: your mom was a freezer

Tdrk: shut up she's not a freezer

Bkg: your dad fucked a freezer

Tdrk: he didn't

Bkg: he did. Your mom made ice cubes for a living

Tdrk: your mom's just the cooler version of you and she dresses better

Bkg: fuck you

Tdrk: sparky boom boom man

Bkg: pokeball

Tdrk: popcorn hands

Bkg: discount harvey dent lookin ass

Tdrk:

Bkg:

Tdrk:

Bkg: that was mean I'm sorry stop pouting

Deku, delighted: Kacchan, are you and todoroki-kun cuddling??

Bkg, with tdrk curled up in his lap, tdrk's face buried in his neck like an overgrown toddler: no fuck you

Anyway drunk bkg's actually very entertaining even though he's a nuisance to deku. Deku can't be mad at him, though, bc bkg's favourite hobby is to tap people on the shoulder and go, "hey. Hey. You see that guy. That's my boyfriend. Ain't his cargo pants dumb as shit. I love him"

Bkg: hey cutie. You single?

Deku: i have a boyfriend

Bkg: well i think you deserve two

Deku, exasperated but hopelessly charmed: I'm really quite alright with just the one

Bkg: deku I'm hungry

Deku: you already went around eating leftover food off people's plates. I'm not feeding you

Bkg: but I'm HUNGRY

Deku: too bad

Bkg: deku I'm gonna die

Deku: we can stop by mcdonald's later

Bkg: bake me a cake

Deku: no

Mitsuki, answering the phone at midnight: katsuki? What's wrong?

Bkg: mom. MOM. How do you keep the - how do you stop your soufflés going kapoot in the oven??

Mitsuki:

Bkg:

Mitsuki: are you drunk

Bkg: answer the fUCKIN question

Mitsuki, giggling: masaru, honey, wake up. Come talk to katsuki. He's shitfaced

Bkg: m'not drunk shut up

Masaru: hello?

Bkg: dad?

Masaru: yeah, buddy. Are you having a good time?

Bkg:

Masaru:

Bkg, quietly: dad how come you never tuck me in anymore

Masaru, instantly tearing up: I'll come over right now

Bkg: and then, and then i-

Deku: KACCHAN THERE YOU ARE oh my god i took your phone away for a reason, who are you talking to?

Bkg: my mom and dad

Deku: alright... i guess that's fine then

Bkg: mom and dad have you met deku we're getting married tomorrow

Deku: NO WE ARE NOT

Bkg: give it BACK i gotta call ALL MIGHT

Deku: you can call him tomorrow!!

Bkg: I HAVE TO TALK TO HIM NOW

Deku: KACCHAN IT IS MIDNIGHT LET THE MAN REST

Deku: oh my god FINE but if he doesn't pick up I'm not trying again

All Might: young bakugou? Is everything alright?

Deku: sir i am so sorry he's drunk and insisted on talking to you

Bkg, shouting in the background: ALL MIGHT I BOUGHT WITH SOCKS WITH YOU ON THEM YOU WANNA SEE

After a very noisy night deku manages to stuff bkg into a taxi lol. Bkg complains the whole time about food so deku makes him instant noodles when they get home

Bkg: open up

Deku: I'm not hungry

Bkg: EAT

Deku: i made them for you!

Bkg: SHARE WITH ME YOU DOUCHE

Bkg: Dekuuuuu don't shower, come to bed

Deku: I'm all sticky

Bkg: don't be naked away from me

Deku: i can't shower with my clothes on

Bkg: let's be naked together dekuuuuu

Deku, laughing: you're being really loud, kacchan. The neighbours will hear

Bkg: don't care

Deku: we'll get noise complaints

Bkg: they're gonna hear a lot worse when i get my hands on you

Deku: oh? What are you gonna do

Bkg: come to bed and find out

Deku: so needy. Fine, I'm here

Bkg: hell yeah you are

Deku: what now, handsome?

Bkg, rolling on top of him: now you let me take care of you

Deku: do your worst

Bkg:

Deku:

Bkg:

Deku:

Bkg:

Deku: ...kacchan?

Bkg: (snores)

Yuki's last drawing (drunk deku) made me think of irritating drunk bkg lol

Anyway pls consider sponsoring some aspirin for kacchan's hangover

Thank https://ko-fi.com/E1E2OGQQ