Okay so... season 1 episode 1 of GoT. A nigga got beheaded less than 2 minutes in. Some zombie things (the man said they’re nightlings) are killing folks left and right.

Lmfao correction. They’re white walkers.

Five minutes in and we are at two beheadings. Cool cool cool.

The Lannisters give me incestuous vibes. They must be the culprits.

Ahhhh so it’s the Queen and her twin brother who be getting freaky freaky.

Oh my. Lots of titties just flashed on the screen. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all

WHY YALL DIDNT TELL ME JASON MUHFUCKIN MOMOA WAS IN THIS SHOW?!!!

I am appalled. This woman’s brother said he would let all 40k men and their horses fuck her. Brother of the year.

OMG. NO THIS LANNISTER NIGGA DID NOT JUST PUSH THIS 10 YO TO HIS MUHFUCKIN DEATH?! I KNOW THATS NOT WTF MY EYES JUST SAW?! *flips table*

Oh phew. He’s not dead.

The queen and her twin brother are sumn. I kinda wanna fight them tbh.

All these story lines got me confused a bit but I’m tryna keep up.

A war. Targaryens. Dothraki. Lannisters. Starks. Sex. An imp. Incest. Horses. Direwolves. Titties. Sex. Dragon eggs. Some big wall thang. More sex. I think I got the gist of it.

I really don’t appreciate how they keep referring to Jon as bastard. Like he doesn’t have a gahdamn name.

Holy testicle Tuesday. Someone came to kill Bran and his mama got her hands all cut up and the direwolf chewed the nigga throat off.

Okay I’m not sure what’s going on with khaleesi and this woman who is teaching her how to “please” her man, but

Okay, Arya bout that life. Had Joffrey crying and begging. Teehee. Love to see it.

Joffrey is a little bitch. Butcher’s son died for nothing. Bout to have Lady executed. I’m irate.

And why sansa raggedy ass lie????? Now her direwolf dead. SMFH. Dweeb.

Okay. Episode 3. So far I am wary of pretty much everybody besides Arya & Khaleesi. Let’s see if that changes lol.

Okay idk bout this Peter person. I’m suspicious.

Sitting here thinking like if the queen been smashing her twin brother then Joffrey prob not really the king’s kid lol. The man confirmed smh.

The Dothraki punking Vinaerys (sp?) just now made my nipples hard. He pulled a sword on khaleesi and she talmbout don’t harm him. Nigga pls!

Khaleesi pregnant?!

Tyrion is funny lmfao. Dry ass sarcasm ftw. On episode 4.

The seed is strong

Ohhh King Robert gotta side baby, eh? All these niggas got babies by other women.

Wondering why Jon Snow has a soft spot for Sam. Does he have a crush?

Yes khaleesi!! Tell that bitch ass brother if he raises another hand to you he not gon have no hands!! WHOOP THAT TRICK!

I’ve never seen a joust match (?) before but are niggas supposed to get stabbed in the throat and die?!!? Methinks not.

Oh shit Catelyn Stark trying to apprehend Tyrion and blaming him for Bran - this is not gon end well. Okay, starting episode 5 then I need sleep lol.

Is the Eyrie a mountain and why were they talking about impregnating it? Lmfao.

Okay so did Ned Stark just quit his assignment? That was quick.

Is this grown ass child breastfeeding?

The king got enough side babies to form a starting 5 & have some bench players. Crazy.

Omg. Jaime Lannister just stabbed Ned Stark right hand man in the eye. This is overwhelming.

I’m really in awe that Bran is freshly paralyzed and both his parents left him in Winterfell. Like?!!

Ohhh khaleesi can touch the hot dragon egg. This means sumn, I know it.

Shit getting really active between the Lannisters and the Starks. Getting really real.

I kinda feel bad for Tyrion but I’m sure it’ll be short-lived.

Holy shit the way Vinerys was killed. Didn’t think Jason Momoa could get any sexier, but alas.

Okay so I just finished S1E9 — I CANNOT BELIEVE JOFFREY HAD NED BEHEADED. LITTLE PUNK ASS BITCH! Why are the Lannisters so terrible Started E10 now.

Wow at Joffrey making Sansa look at her dad’s head on a pike. What the fuck is wrong with this inbred muhfucka??

I would definitely kill Jaime. Idc, you attempted to kill my son. Die, bitch!

Wtf? Cersei fucking her cousin, too?! Lmfaoooooo Jesus.

Oh no. Khaleesi’s baby.

This witch is evil as shit. But I also understand where she’s coming from. But also NOT JASON! Lmfao. I mean Khal Drogo.

Tyrion is funny as hell.

Wow. King Robert had hella outside babies.

Lord Baelish is a sonofabitch!

Omg everyone be turning on each other. This is stressful and I cannot keep up lol.

Cersei is a CUNT.

Every five seconds somebody getting beheaded or their back blown out. Lmfao no wonder this was yall show

Cruster (sp?) be fucking his daughters and then sacrificing his sons?!

Tyrion actually seems to have some honor. Some integrity. I’m sure he’s gonna let me down at some point but thank God somebody on this show has some lmfao Jesus.

Sansa is.... I just don’t know.

Wtf is Joffrey’s problem?!!!!! NO SERIOUSLY?!!!

There’s some sick shit in this show. These niggas tied a bucket with a rat to a man’s chest and heated it up so the rat tried to chew his way out? I just.....

Omg. Wtf did Melisandre just push out her coochie?!

S2E5 — what in the black spirit stabbed Renly?!

I know it’s whatever Melisandre pushed out her coochie. Dis tew much.

Wow. Theon is an asshole. What the fuck, man.

Did Theon daddy give him away? Or did Ned Stark steal him? That part is unclear to me.

Also — WHY THE FUCK are these little children left to run entire regions or cities or towns or whatever? Like Bran been running Winterfell for a long ass time and that’s way too much responsibility, like???

Okay so how does Jon snow miss as hes tryna behead someone? It’s a pretty big target Lmfaoo.

Or did he miss on purpose.

Okay the people of King’s Landing rebelling! That’s right. Fuck em up!

Tyrion is bout that life lmfao he just smacked Joffrey. WHOOP THAT TRICK!

They about to rape Sansa?

Oh phew. The hound gotta soft spot for Sansa.

This man killing people for Arya. I have to stan.

Is Jon bout to tap some wildling ass?

Omg. Tyrion’s lover / Sansa’s handmaiden telling Sansa not to trust anyone seems like some foreshadowing.

Omg. Who killed Khaleesi people and stole her dragons?! Lmfao why is everyone so terrible Starting S2E7.

In the last episode, I had a feeling the wildling was going to save Bran & company. Glad she succeeded.

Also, when the hound said he didn’t save Sansa for Tyrion..... I need to know why he saves Sansa and always be looking out for her. Maybe it has something to do with her clapping for him after the joust match when he stood up to his brother?

Not the hound telling Sansa he enjoys killing. Lmfao a bunch of sociopaths, the lot of them!!

I know one muhfucking thing. If Theon Greyjoy sniveling ass harms Bran or Rickon ima throw sumn at my TV.

Nooooooo Sansa got her period!!

Wow at Jaime killing his own cousin. I’m not sure I’m surprised. Nothing is shocking at this point.

Theon think he slick with these two burnt babies but sumn tells me these are the two orphans... not Bran and Rickon. Smh children and babies be dying left and right.

Jon Snow bout to get got by these wildlings or... ? S2E8. Whew. Y’all wasn’t playing when you said buckle up, Lord Jesus.

Theon sister (Yara?) be punking him. As she should. Bc he’s an idiot.

Catelyn dumb ass let Jaime go??! Girl, wtf??? I be wanting to smack everybody on this show.

Stannis is WEIRDT and he has the personality of a wet paper bag.

S2E9. I hope Theon gets beat the fuck up sometime before the end of the season.

What is Cersei bout to do with this elixir the maester gave to her? Rhetorical. Don’t tell me. Lmfao.

I didn’t realize the hound was beefing with Bronn. So many muhfuckas don’t like each other, I can’t keep up.

Joffrey is a coward. I know he gon be cowering in a corner somewhere. Little bitch.

Smh. Tyrion really bout to have the wildfire launched at the Baratheon ships.

Cersei is an evil cunt. Why she tryna get Sansa drunk? And talking shit about her for praying? Lmfao.

The hound is triggered by the fire, I see. Interesting.

I am CRYINGGG at the hound saying fuck the kings guard, fuck the king, fuck the city. FED UP!

Oh shit. Tyrion leading the charge and just got his face sliced up.

Wow. Cersei keeps getting worse. Gonna throw Sansa to the side and encourage Joffrey to marry Margaery (sp?). Though, Sansa seems to be relieved.