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Who should I be in life? | TDIP E2 (4:40)
(or How should I choose my commitments?)
A thread
https://lorenzosbizarreplaylists.wordpress.com/2020/11/09/who-should-i-be-in-life-tdip-e2-440/
(or How should I choose my commitments?)
A thread
https://lorenzosbizarreplaylists.wordpress.com/2020/11/09/who-should-i-be-in-life-tdip-e2-440/
Have you ever climbed a mountain? I may not be an avid mountaineer and I know some who’d like to spend their vacations conquering the highest peaks or just trailing it just for the sake of it. Whether you are an expert or a newbie, one cannot deny the importance of preparation.
Taking enough bottles of water, knowing the pathway and having a guide can mean the difference between having an enjoyable hike or a punishing stroll up to Calvary.
Commitments are somehow like mountains. They are quite challenging but, as we have discovered in the last article, are an essential part of being human. Whether we like it or not, we have to climb up the mountain.
One can prolong the agony by trying to go around it but there will always be a mountain, a commitment, to face you.
If they are inevitable, how should I make my commitments?
If they are inevitable, how should I make my commitments?
There are some mountains which are unexplored and some which have been used by lots of mountaineers in the past.
The difference between them is that the former doesn’t yet have a path while the latter already has a cleared-out pathway—and even a sari-sari store up in the clouds—for you to easily follow.
Making commitments actually doesn’t mean treading out in the dark and experimenting with your life. Many of us would think that choosing marriage, priesthood or even a single life involves buying a mystery box without knowing if the gift inside will actually please you or not.
Quite the opposite! Commitments are made because you know there is happiness and fulfillment at the end of it.
Though we cannot erase doubts and ignorance about the future, you can always hold on to what is present: your life, your past and your present. These things have already marked out a path for you to follow.
For example, a boy was raised up in a family of athletes where the father, brother and sister are all basketball players and the main way for the family to bond is through sports.
Furthermore, the elementary school he attends has a good sports program and all of the friends he makes there are also avid sports lovers.
One can already guess that the path he should choose, the commitment he should make, is that of a professional athlete. Such was the family background and situation of Michael Jordan, albeit one of the, if not the, greatest basketball player of all time.
If you were in his shoes, it would be unthinkable for him to dream of “I want to be a politician.” Though it is a possibility, politics is not something his past has formed for him.
Life then is very much like a river. Water does not try to make out new channels or pathways for it to flow; it only goes where a path has already existed and it only goes to make it bigger. A river always tries to maintain its flow rather than make a new one.
The same goes with life. Your past, your temperaments, your hobbies, your inclinations, your personalities, your interests have already carved out a path for you to follow and it will lead you to your happiness.
Trying to go against it, making out a new one might cost you much time and energy and might not lead you to true happiness.
What then is true happiness? It is born from self-knowledge, self-awareness and self-acceptance. I know myself and I am aware of what I know. Because this is the truth about me, I must accept it.
A lot of problems arise when these three are missing. Addiction is born from the absence of self-knowledge and self-awareness.
Trying to patch up his family problems, a person would resort in alcohol, drugs and other addictive behaviors; instead of facing and acknowledging problems, he/she only sidesteps it but in the end the problems would end up crashing down on him/her.
Try to take stock of yourself, your abilities, your interests, your personality, your values. They are the key in making a lasting commitment that leaves you fulfilled and happy. This doesn’t happen overnight.
It is something we do every day, constantly meditating and discovering until we reach the point that we have sufficient knowledge about ourselves. This is what we call “vocational discernment”
But even with the right preparations and knowledge, one can still get lost in the mountains. For that, you need a guide. Life is also very much like that and so much more complicated.
Listening to the advice of elders, of those who have gone before us and have already made the right—and wrong—decisions will help us.
It is only the stubborn and the proud who would refuse any help: stubborn enough to admit he/she needs help and proud enough to admit he/she doesn’t know much. That is why couples try to ask married ones what married life is like, why seminarians ask what priestly life is like.
To believe that you—and your partner—can go through the challenges of committed life alone is tantamount to saying “I can do everything. I don’t need anybody else.”
And you know what happens to people who think too highly of themselves.
And you know what happens to people who think too highly of themselves.
That is what being humble means—from the Latin humus meaning earth. We must remain grounded in our feet, knowing where we come from and where are we are going in the end.
Nobody climbs up the mountain flying—unless you are Superman or Thor. So, stand on your feet and march through the pathway that life has already marked out for you.
This thread can be read here: https://lorenzosbizarreplaylists.wordpress.com/2020/11/09/who-should-i-be-in-life-tdip-e2-440/
