been thinking about the origins of the term comphet and if there’s an alternative. “comphet” was coined by a TERF and is strongly tied to political lesbianism. i did experience pressure to like men that registered as attraction to me, so i wanted a way to talk about that.

then, @QueerTransFemme introduced me to “coercive heteronormativity” and it resonated. it’s exactly how it felt. i think i’m going to start using it instead to discuss the experiences many lesbians have in a heteronormative society that makes discomfort read as attraction to men.

so, here we go. realizing i was dealing with coercive heteronormativity was my lightbulb moment. dating men made me depersonalize. kissing them felt like nothing. i thought sickening anxiety was just “butterflies.” i couldn’t deny the truth anymore.

i was just... a lesbian.

here’s the thread: https://twitter.com/queertransfemme/status/1325530082790658048