wwx, after playing intense sports yesterday and referring to Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness: haha my thighs hurt so much after yesterday curse u doms

lwj, completely misunderstanding: oh.

this wasn't MEANT to be a thread but i sent it to @akatsukiwwx and our braincell came up with misunderstanding after misunderstanding,, so HERE WE GO

wwx: it hurts but it felt good tho i need to do it more often

lwj: ?????

but also lwj, internally: Who Is This Dom Wei Ying. Who Is This Dom And Why Is It Not Me.

wwx, completely oblivious: hah don’t look so mad lan zhan i’m okay my ass is a little sore tho :((

(because he fell over so many times, obviously)

lwj: thinks about ass in silence

wwx: aw lan zhan are you mad bc i didn’t invite you! it’s okay do you want to do it together next time?

lwj: error 404 not found

lwj: ...

wwx: ?? lan zhan what’s wrong don’t worry haha i’ll guide you i have a lot of experience

wwx: oh but you don’t look like the type to enjoy it very much though :/

(he is, of course, referring to soccer in which you can get very muddy)

lwj: Little Do You Know

wwx: well if u don’t mind getting dirty with me lan zhan we should try it :D

lwj: if.. that’s what wei ying wants

lwj vs wwx google search:

wwx: oh wait should we start with something tamer for you? like indoors? hmm

lwj, panicking: it’s ... NOT indoors ???

lwj on the outside is:

but on the inside he’s just:

lwj: you... want to go... outdoors?

wwx: that’s the point lan zhan!! outdoor activities are more fun and thrilling :DD

wwx, patting lwj’s arm: lan zhan ur so Big ur well equipped for this

(big as in tall, long legs, good for running for the ball and everything you know)

lwj, thinking: How Does He Know

wwx: but you know lan zhan i’m pretty good i can go for a long time without getting tired. my stamina is great are you sure you can keep up?

lwj, internally: bet.

lwj, externally: stamina is not a problem

wwx: looks like we’ll find out!! anyway who else should we invite?

lwj, dreams shattering, bubble popping, crashing down into reality: invite.

wwx: yes!! the more the merrier right?

lwj, wheezing: o t h e r ,, people

wwx: ..yes? ah i guess you’d prefer one on one to start off with huh, i get it

lwj has never agreed so fast in his life

(wwx should’ve known, lwj is a beginner he wouldn’t want to be embarrassed by playing badly in front of the others! what was he thinking!)

wwx: don’t be afraid to go hard on me lan zhan okay? i can take it. one time it was so intense my knees were purple for DAYS!! but it was really wet that day? so i guess that’s why.

(it rained a lot, wwx fell over a lot, so ofc there were bruises)

lwj, trying to process all this information within such a short amount of time:

but also lwj, internally taking notes : wei ying do you .. like it.. wet

wwx: well it’s obviously more messier but also more fun that way i think

wwx: don’t worry lan zhan it’ll be dry when we do it

(that’s the point of playing indoors right, no weather to mess with stuff)

meanwhile, lwj’s sanity:

was that even possible ??? what was wei ying saying ?? his mouth was moving but there’s only ringing in lwj’s ears, it’s too h—

wwx: —something easy to move around in on saturday okay?

lwj, having no idea what he’s agreeing to: yes that is fine. would you like me to bring anything?

(maybe some snacks, fruits, or ice cream, if they cuddled afterwards)

wwx: oh no it’s okay, i’ve already got the equipment!!!

lwj: oh, yes, of course. equipment

also lwj:

wwx: just bring urself lan er gege that’s enough for me

lwj, still trying to figure out what wwx means by Equipment: i’ll see you on saturday wei ying.

anyway so saturday rolls around and lwj meets wwx at his house and wwx opens the door looking like this:

wwx: lan zhan are you ready!!

lwj, so busy looking at wwx’s face that he doesn’t even notice the get up: yes wei ying i’m r—

wwx, bringing a ball out from behind his back: for soccer !!!!!! :DDD

lwj:

lwj, hiding the bags (wei ying said not to bring anything but just in case) of snacks, lube and condoms behind his back: yes. ready. for soccer. the game which i came to play. indeed.

but also lwj:

so they go play soccer and lwj absolutely smashes wwx (but not in the way he was expecting ) bc he is actually very good at soccer and wwx is confused because “why didn’t you tell me lan zhan, you’re so mean!” and lwj avoids looking him in the eyes and that is the end of that.

(except when they go to the changing rooms afterwards and wwx is taking off his shirt and lwj snaps and, well, wwx ends up with bruises not just on his knees)

LMAO OKAY IM DONE NOW THIS WAS SO STUPID BUT I HOPE YOU SMILED AND IM GLAD MY PE CLASSES CAME IN HANDY FOR ONCE !!!! (also all my love to dia who screamed abt this in dms with me and came up with the quality memes tysm bby ilu )