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I know that most of you know that Donald J. Trump is likely a malignant narcissist. After he stews about losing, blames everyone but himself, has a tantrum and whines about the unfairness of it all, he is likely to go scorched earth. Here are some things you should know:
1) You are going to need good boundaries. Mute him. Block him. Block his supporters. Do whatever you need to protect yourself and others who need protection. https://www.google.com/amp/s/narcissistabusesupport.com/boundaries-a-narcissists-scorched-earth/amp/
2) Don’t show emotional reaction to his ploys to stir up your anger, pain or whatever emotion (likely negative) that he elicits from you. Also, don't feed into these same tactics used by his sycophants. This is the grey rock method: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/201911/the-price-and-payoff-gray-rock-strategy%3famp
3) Come up with a safety plan. Our whole country needs one rn. But you’re going to have to sit down with yourself (and perhaps your family) and figure out how to lessen the damage that the president is likely to inflict on those who didn’t vote for him. https://wscadv.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/Short-list-of-questions-Common-Aspects-of-Safety-Planning.pdf
4) Your job until inauguration will be to ride out the storm. Gather supplies. Focus on self care and care of you physical body. Find a safe social outlet. Check on your loved ones. Be “selfish” about seeking you own happiness. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.businessinsider.com/what-its-like-narcissist-break-up-2017-2%3famp
5) Remember that some of Trump’s supporters will be experiencing his discard phase for the 1st time. It’s not your job to help them through this, but remember that lack of empathy is one of the reasons that we are where we are currently. Work towards normalizing empathy again.
6) Think about what it looks like to go no contact with Trump. This looks like boundaries in step 1, but more extreme. You might have to ask for friends & family to not speak of him around you. Mute his name on Twitter. Don’t watch his videos. Your brain needs a break from chaos.
7) Wean yourself from drama. Normalize boring and mundane interactions. You probably don’t even recognize how dependent you are on the ups and downs of this relationship we’ve had with Trump. Even if you can’t stand him, he has been a constant topic of conversation for 4+ yrs.
8) Develop skills of critical thinking & independence. The narcissist will take over areas of your life where you were formerly competent. They will make you need them to fix everything for you or you can’t do it on you own. Start to feel proud of your accomplishments.
9) Build a support network around you if you don’t have one already. See a therapist if you are able to. Take your meds. Drink water. Eat. Shower. Sleep. Survive.
10) If you are able to do most of this, it be somewhat easier to weather whatever happens during Trump’s scorched earth phase. Trust me. I survived breaking up with a narcissist. We have each other & when it’s all over we can work on healing our collective & generational trauma.
