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Tonight on #remembrancethreads I’ll quickly talk you through the rituals I undertake at work and at home.
I’ll talk briefly about what it meant to me early on in Army life and what it means to me now.
I’ll talk briefly about what it meant to me early on in Army life and what it means to me now.
I joined the Army straight after Uni.
I completed Officer selection at school - so always had a ‘place’.
Remembrance day when I was younger was all about local and community themes. I remember why we were there but I never had a connection to the names or memorial.
I completed Officer selection at school - so always had a ‘place’.
Remembrance day when I was younger was all about local and community themes. I remember why we were there but I never had a connection to the names or memorial.
As a teen I became better connected with the subject as the memorial that held the name of my great grandfather was (1) vandalised and (2) had the brass figure stolen.
Into the Army then and training at the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst.
The Sandhurst Chapel is an incredible memorial. The names of the fallen are recorded in a ledger that is turned each Sunday and on the pillars and walls all around you.
This was about heritage & belonging
The Sandhurst Chapel is an incredible memorial. The names of the fallen are recorded in a ledger that is turned each Sunday and on the pillars and walls all around you.
This was about heritage & belonging
At Regimental Duty memorials were incredibly important to ethos. Wooden boards and our ‘Standard’ were in RHQ, and on passing either of both, one would have to salute. Drumhead services also brought the Regiment together to reflect. In these early days I had not yet deployed.
The RDG were incredibly fortunate to have antecedent Regiments stretching way back to the 17th century. One was expected to know battle honours, histories and famous personalities including Cornet Richardson, Carton de Wiart and Field Marshal Bagnall.
Then wars came.
It wasn’t long before I felt the personal loss of friends and colleagues. Alex was evacuated to Edinburgh. I happened to be in town and was able to visit with him and his family. We completed our Troop Leaders course. A friend plants a tree each year in April.
It wasn’t long before I felt the personal loss of friends and colleagues. Alex was evacuated to Edinburgh. I happened to be in town and was able to visit with him and his family. We completed our Troop Leaders course. A friend plants a tree each year in April.
My own operational experience is rather tame. But leaving and being away is where it’s difficult. Everyone moves on in the time you’re away - and roles change too. Reassembling all these pieces of the family, readjusting coping systems, emotions and roles - it’s all tough.
My time in Afghanistan was about international friendships. I worked in a big HQ, conducting strategic and operational plans across the Af/Pak region.
Each Monday the names of all the fallen, from every nation, were read out at the end of the morning briefing. It was arresting.
Each Monday the names of all the fallen, from every nation, were read out at the end of the morning briefing. It was arresting.
Conflict isn’t the only source of loss. in my military life.
Chronic disease has also, sadly, taken its toll on people I’ve worked with and felt I barley knew but loved so much.
The military is a family and in 20 years, there’s a roll call.
I think of Phil in particular.
Chronic disease has also, sadly, taken its toll on people I’ve worked with and felt I barley knew but loved so much.
The military is a family and in 20 years, there’s a roll call.
I think of Phil in particular.
Remembrance Day, for me, is a soup of these emotions.
Pride in a tradition of selflessness and courage.
I feel small and humbled in this context - I think of friends lost and their families that endure.
I think of Bob.
And there is guilt - lots of it. https://www.gov.uk/government/fatalities/sergeant-david-thomas-monkhouse-killed-in-afghanistan
Pride in a tradition of selflessness and courage.
I feel small and humbled in this context - I think of friends lost and their families that endure.
I think of Bob.
And there is guilt - lots of it. https://www.gov.uk/government/fatalities/sergeant-david-thomas-monkhouse-killed-in-afghanistan
Guilt because you are here and they are not. You have you health, your body, your family and others do not.
It’s more than a sadness, it’s a strange sinking feeling. But it is fleeting and you know it will pass.
Sometimes I think of it as a penance or atonement & remembrance.
It’s more than a sadness, it’s a strange sinking feeling. But it is fleeting and you know it will pass.
Sometimes I think of it as a penance or atonement & remembrance.
The day is about small rituals.
The family know the weekend is tough. I like others prefer to be at hone and attend a local service.
0630-1000 Polishing belts, buckles, shoes and medals is the liminal time that lets me prepare and think with structure and purpose.
The family know the weekend is tough. I like others prefer to be at hone and attend a local service.
0630-1000 Polishing belts, buckles, shoes and medals is the liminal time that lets me prepare and think with structure and purpose.
The ritual of donning uniform, shoes, Sam Browne, beret and then medals is like putting on a shell.
It coats the self and puts you into your ‘military’ persona, a more public you.
It gives you an identity, makes you a little more anonymous and is a moniker to live up to.
It coats the self and puts you into your ‘military’ persona, a more public you.
It gives you an identity, makes you a little more anonymous and is a moniker to live up to.
Dressed and ready to go I normally become quieter and more reflective.
The ‘stiff upper lip’ but kicks in. Le you’re dressed and representing the Army, your Regiment and your rank.
You are a physical emodiment of the organisation and all those things to everyone else.
The ‘stiff upper lip’ but kicks in. Le you’re dressed and representing the Army, your Regiment and your rank.
You are a physical emodiment of the organisation and all those things to everyone else.
I guess in my own remembrance I’m in the Jay Winter school of public, personal and collective all at the same time and in the same space.
That soup of emotions, pride, heritage, belonging, grief, penance, atonement and guilt - also happens all at the same time and place.
That soup of emotions, pride, heritage, belonging, grief, penance, atonement and guilt - also happens all at the same time and place.
But I don’t want you to read this and think “oh poor you”.
I’m no victim.
I’m not bad or mad.
Neither are the majority of my colleagues and mates.
Some need assistance and I hope they access the help they need.
I’m no victim.
I’m not bad or mad.
Neither are the majority of my colleagues and mates.
Some need assistance and I hope they access the help they need.
This for me is one of the best videos that’s been put together and sums it up for me.
