There's frustration with the mainstream media for not calling the election, when they would in any other circumstance. Without defending the abundance of caution, I can say I understand it. This is a situation where understanding the dynamics of domestic abuse helps a lot.

Women seeking to leave an abusive partner — or kids trying to leave abusive parents — often have to have *all* their ducks in a row: A secret bank account, a safe house the abuser doesn't know about, a security plan at work, a plan for when he won't be home and they can escape.

The reason for this is that abusers will use *any* leverage point they can find in order to force themselves back into the lives of their victims. And so, while it may take time to leave and leaves you in danger while you're arranging it, it's still often the best choice.

Trump is an abuser, and we are all his victims — especially journalists, who are a main target of his vitriol and gaslighting. And so they believe they must have *all* ducks in a row, because any teeny error will spin out an elaborate conspiracy leveraged against them for years.

That said, it's important to also understand that abuse victims suffer trauma, and that trauma causes them to sometimes see threats where none exist, or fear their abuser has power where he doesn't have it. That might be going on here.

So it's fine to ask hard questions about how bad Trump can make it for them if there's a call that ends up being premature. I don't know the answer to that. Maybe he's a paper tiger on this. Maybe it can leverage it to get a SCOTUS decision. I don't know.

My gut is telling me that it's probably better to be extra cautious and leave those champagne bottles where they're at, rather than give this asshole the excuses he's hunting for to wage war. So while it sucks, I am finding patience in this understanding.

Take comfort in this: By making it impossible for anyone to make a move until every single duck is in a row, Trump is drawing out his own agony. This is what happens to abusers: There desperation for control gives them unnecessary pain. And no one deserves it better than Trump.