The reason why so many of us are attracted to toxic relationships is because that’s all we’ve ever seen growing up. When you grow up in chaos, chaos is the only thing you know. Real love becomes alien and unwanted. You have to dig deep & recondition yourself.

When you grow up with your mom never being loved by your father, that longing can become your normal. To a point you don’t find emotionally available men attractive. These are the poisons we deal with in our adult lives. Psychological programming gone wrong.

Some grow up with alcoholic fathers and before they know it, they walk into a room and almost intrinsically are drawn to the alcoholic man in the room; the spitting image of their father. How do you undo that? How do you reprogram yourself?

People say adulting is hard when it comes to getting a job and paying bills; ADULTING IS HARD WHEN IT COMES TO OVERCOMING CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND RECONFIGURING YOURSELF TO NOT SELF-SABOTAGE AND REGURGITATE THE MISTAKES YOUR PARENTS MADE.

THAT is hard.

A good place to start is knowing. Knowing the issues you have with your childhood, observing the patterns, acknowledging the damage, speaking with yourself, communicating what you should do vs what you’re [un]naturally inclined to do, calling yourself out.

And to end this thread, this is why I’m so forgiving towards “toxic people”. A lot of us are products of a chaotic upbringing we struggle to overcome in our adult lives. Not everyone had a happy, healthy family. But we fight, and by hook or crook, WE PREVAIL.