in honor of quirky bitch hours, welcome to a series i call “things @waverlyhaughttt says to me when we’re on facetime”
“i am my own woman. i make myself laugh”
update now she’s laughing hysterically at what she just said
“why do you eat strawberries like that”
*spins phone off of side of bed by charger then laughs hysterically at it*
“who’s hate criming you? your mom?”
“what should we name our horses? bitch 1 and bitch 2.”
“what if i only had a nub? it would be like, ‘hey girlie pop’”
“i’m gonna get you a really nice cardboard box, like the home depot kind”
“this is what women’s suffrage fought for, ass rights”
*in context of twerking* “dream to achieve”
“oh my god, bear coochie”
“what if our tongues didn’t stay in our mouths?”
“i’m gonna do pickup lines on you. are you a grape?”
currently she’s reading this thread through and laughing hysterically
You can follow @scrptdwayhaught.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

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