“What’s your feeling about a prosthetics gig? I know you’ve said you hate it,” it was my agent on the other end of the call.

My mind flashed back to my days of misery spent as the demon, Menlo, on the tv series, ANGEL. I had eagerly jumped at the chance...

1

...to be transformed into an other-worldly being via Hollywood special effects set my Halloween-loving heart aflame. By the time it ended two weeks later, the thrill had not just worn off, it had been sandblasted down to a nub, just as four hours sitting in a...

2

... makeup chair every day had done to my skin.

“Hell, No. Sheer fucking misery.”

“We just got a call with an offer for TV — it’s prosthetics though.”

“No.”

“It’s Disney, but I’ll let them know. Something to do with STAR WARS…”

“WAIT. WHAT???”

3

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away…

June, 1977, I was sitting in a movie theater at the Daytona Beach, FL Mall. My Mom had allowed me to bring a buddy along on our annual family vacation. We had long list of Things We Wanted To Do In Florida...

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...but topping it was going to see this movie I’d heard all my buddies talking about back home.

“That outer space thing?” My mother’s dismissive attitude offended me, but the idea of an afternoon on the beach without two pubescent, hyper, boys likely appealed to her.

5

My folks drove us to the mall and dropped us off.

Popcorn, Goobers, and Coke in hand, I sat in utter thrall as that Imperial II - Class Star Destroyer flew overhead. Of course, in that particular moment, I didn’t know the proper name of the space ship that just kept going...

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... and going and going and going, but it made my pubescent heart race like only Farrah had been able to do prior.

The memory of that thrill has never left me.

*

“STAR WARS??? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? THE MANDALORIAN — IS IT FOR MANDALORIAN???”

“Yes, it seems that...

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Jon Favreau has asked for you…”

Days later, I was sitting in the EFX shop getting my head molded for prosthetics.

*

Season One was set to start streaming the day after I was to start work on Season Two, so I had not seen anything but the buzz on the show was extraordinary.

8

I had no idea what episode number I was in. Before I started work, I had to sign an NDA that was seven pages long. The day that I went in for my EFX makeup screen test, I was hidden underneath a massive cloak and had to be escorted anytime I moved between stages on the lot.

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They are a secretive bunch.

I was given the scenes I was in and nothing else. This is what information I was given: I was a Weequay; I owned the catina in Mos Pelgo. “Cobb Vanth” wore Bobba Fett’s armor. Sarlac’s can move underground.

10b

My scenes were with Pedro (whom I’ve known for many years), Tim Olyphant (recreating our DEADWOOD dynamic of Sheriff and Barkeep), and a third actor. That is all the info I was given. They are a secretive bunch.

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My wife works in the streaming division of the Walt Disney Company. As an exec in Communications, she is aware of many of the inner goings-on of the company. She listened to me prattle on for days — STAR WARS, STAR WARS, STAR WARS…she said nothing. They are a secretive bunch

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First day. I get in makeup and wardrobe. I was cloaked and put in a van. I was told that, unlike the majority of MANDALORIAN sets which are computer created on a soundstage, mine is an actual set built in a parking lot about a mile away from the studio. We drive there.

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The teamster pulls into the gate. Another person takes over and drives me onto the set….

Its Tatooine. I AM ON TATOOINE!!! HELL YEAH!!! FUCK YEAH!!!

I get out of the van. Right next to me — is a life-sized Bantha puppet. I touched it — A BANTHA!!! I TOUCHED A BANTHA!

14

“Jon is ready for rehearsals” In a daze, I am lead to my Mos Pelgo’s Cantina. There’s Tim. There’s Pedro. I look around, but don’t see the other actor I’m supposed to be working with.

I stand behind the bar. For shits & giggles, I say to Tim, “you oughta pin that fuckin’...

15

... badge to yer chest, you’re hypocrite enough to wear it.” Tim and I proceed to play out scenes from our old show. We get a few giggles from the HBO watchers.

Jon walks on set, laughing “I swear to God, I love that show — I absolutely idolize Milch. We cast you first,”

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pointing at Tim, “when I said ‘hire Earl Brown’ I did not consciously think I was recreating your DEADWOOD dynamic, but here we are — DEADWOOD In Space… Okay, let’s rehearse”

“Can we improvise and throw a few ‘Cocksuckers’ into the dialogue, as tribute?”

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“No… Okay everyone, PLACES…”

I still had not met my other scene partner. The Props guy rolled his cart through the set. I thought, “Awwwwww… that is so cute. The props guy went and made himself a Baby Yoda.”

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Tim goes to his starting position. Pedro walks off set, so as to make his entrance with The Child, still I don’t see no kid actor.

Tim and I talk — yada, yada, yada. Pedro and The Child enter…

There are numerous “The Childs” — motionless, puppets, puppets on poles...

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an EFX globe used to gauge digital effects.

I came home that night, “How was it?” asked The Wife.

“Did you know there is a BABY YODA???”

She just smiled.

They are a secretive bunch.

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*

ANIMAL HOUSE made me want to be in movies — I was in THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY; HALLOWEEN made me want to be in movies — I was in SCREAM. STAR WARS made me want to be in movies…

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This morning Facebook Memories reminded me that on this day in 2012, I posted a photo of the Star Wars logo and commented on my excitement that three new movies had been announced and how badly I hoped I could get cast in one of them.
It’s been almost a year to the day...

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since I met The Child. In that time, I have forced myself to use restraint and not shout my news to the high heavens. I told a few friends and some family members, folks I swore to secrecy. I posted an Instagram photo of me wearing my MANDO Season Two Crew Hoodie.

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But now Season Two, Episode One has aired, I can speak freely —

I AM IN STAR WARS!!! I AM IN STAR WARS!!! I AM IN STAR WARS!!!

24/fin