what each chris evans character would give to children trick or treating on halloween: a thread

andy barber (defending jacob)
gets large sized chocolate bars. none of this “fun sized” nonsense

ransom drysdale (knives out)
bold of you to assume he would ever let those annoying brats within 20 metres of his home

frank adler (gifted)
he forgot to get any candy as he spent the day trying to fulfil mary’s request to make fred a costume so he just gives them random loose change he’s found in his pockets

steve rogers (marvel cinematic universe)
would give them a granola bar while the parents were looking to maintain his reputation while sneaking a chocolate bar into their pocket

me (playing it cool)
buys a small multipack from the dollar tree at last minute of gross flavoured gummies nobody wants

nick vaughn (before we go)
makes homemade halloween cookies for all the trick or treaters because he’s baby

curtis everett (snowpiercer)
protein bars for all. be grateful. it’s either these or babies. I know which option I’d prefer

robert pronge (the iceman)
little known fact: his nickname “mr freezy” actually originates from him giving ice cream to trick or treaters and definitely not from being a hitman who freezes bodies

colin shea (what’s your number)
would pretend like he wasn’t in the apartment until a small child hears him mutter “shit” when he trips in the dark

mike weiss (puncture)
too busy to be in the house so leaves a bowl outside with a hand written note saying “take one” only for them to all disappear within the first few minutes

lucas lee (scott pilgrim vs the world)
a signed print of himself. but the actual signature came from his stunt double. he was too lazy to do it all himself

jake jensen (the losers)
hands out fun sized candy to everyone. unless it was a member of the marigolds. then he would throw the empty bowl at their heads because the petunias are superior

nick gant (push)
doesn’t buy any candy as he never gets trick or treaters. spends the night camped on the sofa watching scary movies instead

jimmy dobyne (the loss of a teardrop diamond)
through my extensive research (i.e a quick 2 minute google search) I have discovered he’d have a supply of baby ruth

paul diskant (street kings)
radiates candy corn energy. whether that’s a good or bad thing I’ll leave up to you to decide

hayden / harvard hottie (the nanny diaries)
gets the mini candy halloween multipacks but don’t worry. he’s not stingy. he lets the children have a couple each

james mace (sunshine)
he’s in space. and dead. I don’t really think he’ll be answering the door anytime soon

johnny storm (fantastic four)
answers the door entirely coated in flames to impress the kids while their mothers frantically scream and drag them away before he’s had chance to give them the candy

syd (london)
gives them a small bag of sugar he found in his house. wait - no - that’s not sugar. oh god.

bryce (fierce people)
gives them onions coated in chocolate because he’s an evil little shit who enjoys watching their faces of disappointment

ryan (cellular)
quickly grabs a random bag he sees on special offer at the store while hunting for a charger. later finds out they’re actually dog treats

kyle (the perfect score)
his mother planned in advance to make sure the house was stocked up on the best types of candy. he pockets a few reeses cups before giving his least favourite to the trick or treaters

jake wyler (not another teen movie)
dumps the entire candy bowl into the first trick or treater he comes across’s bag before leaving the house to go to a party

bonus: chris evans himself
he didn’t say on jimmy kimmel what candy he gives which is very rude considering I have been working on this thread for the last 2 days but I’m going to assume jelly beans