Read on Twitter
Legit think I might do a video essay on how NieR Automata has impacted me and my entire outlook on life. Haven’t made a video in years. But I think this is something important enough to me that I need to get it out there. Not for views, not for attention, but for myself.
I said months ago, even before I finished the game, that it was probably the most important game I’ve played. Finishing the game confirmed that for me.
Now, several months later, I can safely say it’s the single most important piece of media I’ve consumed.
Now, several months later, I can safely say it’s the single most important piece of media I’ve consumed.
And honestly, looking to the future now instead of the past, it might stay that way for several years, maybe even the rest of my life. But even then, I can safely say I’ll never forget that game and the experience I got during the entire playthrough.
In my entire life, I’ve only struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts once. That was several years ago, and luckily it only lasted for a month or two. Some of you who follow me and are still reading this probably know when these thoughts occurred.
So I haven’t been depressed for years. That being said, I think I can safely say NieR Automata saved my life. You experience so many empty emotions during that game, and it takes you to some pretty dark places. My wife, Kristyn, had to stop playing it because of this.
You feel hopeless at times, sad at others. You might even feel depressed and apathetic when you reach a certain part of the story because you feel like there’s literally no point to your efforts and what you’ve been working towards.
I would argue that during 90, maybe 95% of your time playing through the entire game, you’ll be feeling some sort of negative emotion. This is by design, and the payoff for it all at the end is wonderfully beautiful. But the ending of the story isn’t what delivers the payoff.
The endings of the game, whichever you end up with (there’s multiple), are relatively sad in their own way. They’re almost unsatisfying.
But, when you finish both endings, you get put into a sequence that is so personal between you and the creators of the game, there isn’t just a fourth wall break, that wall is utterly and completely shattered.
It’s important to note that I spoiled the game for myself by watching a few video analyses. The first time I heard and saw this sequence of someone explaining it, I will happily admit I shed a tear or two.
I cried again when I experienced the sequence for myself a month later.
I cried again when I experienced the sequence for myself a month later.
I can’t get into details without spoiling everything, and I don’t want to do that here in this thread where I can’t censor those spoilers. But, I think this helped me get a few of my thoughts out about the game and process a bit of what I’ve been feeling for months now about it.