I like to think about the possibilities for life with masculinity that isn’t toxic. Bob Ross is a great example. He got out of the air force and became the lovable painter guy because he never wanted to yell at anybody ever again.

I’m a fairly stereotypical representation of masculinity, with a few off-type indulgences, and I like who I am and what I am. Nobody said you have to reject masculinity, just don’t be a festering, toxic pile of waste. It’s not a hard concept to grasp.

I like wearing a beard, chopping things, eating red meat and drinking black coffee. I think of myself as a provider and protector.

Protecting means creating safe spaces. You can’t protect someone by invalidating their emotions. You can’t protect anybody if you’re afraid to cry.

Toxic masculinity is a costume. It’s the fearful belief that your fragile grasp on manhood can be taken away at anytime, by anyone who happens to be meaner than you.

Masculinity, femininity, non-binary - that’s strength. Strength is knowing no outside force can move you.

Masculinity is loving my kids. It’s teaching them and learning from them. It’s playing barbies with my daughter and my son, reminding them that barbies are for anybody who wants to play with the. It’s teaching and modeling consent. It’s loving them and showing them love.

Masculinity is good, masculinity is wholesome. If you identify as masculine, it’s your job and responsibility to reclaim it. Protect. Love. Validate.

Hug your guy friends, and tell them you love them. Get your buddies into therapy. Talk about accountability.
Show strength.