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HALLOWEEN CANDY HOT TAKES BC IM BORED AND WANNA START SH!T:
Generic and Basic. Can’t say more, can’t say less. World’s okay-eat candy. Only people I know who really love these were kids who used to crush them and snort them.
NECCO WAFERS
Sweet Tarts without the joy! Might as well eat old dusty pennies because you’ll get the same amount of enjoyment. Glorified chalk.
Sweet Tarts without the joy! Might as well eat old dusty pennies because you’ll get the same amount of enjoyment. Glorified chalk.
GOOD & PLENTY
Convinced these don’t exist because I’ve never seen them irl. Seriously who eats these. Old people don’t even touch them. Is this a money laundering front-
Convinced these don’t exist because I’ve never seen them irl. Seriously who eats these. Old people don’t even touch them. Is this a money laundering front-
CANDY DOTS
What I imagine a Yankee Candle tastes like. And what kinda nut case thought it’d be fun to bite candy off of a piece of paper
What I imagine a Yankee Candle tastes like. And what kinda nut case thought it’d be fun to bite candy off of a piece of paper
3 MUSKATEERS
You might as well eat a piece memory foam covered in chocolate because it’s got the same texture. Also boring as hell. Nothing amazing about it. Not even an A for effort.
You might as well eat a piece memory foam covered in chocolate because it’s got the same texture. Also boring as hell. Nothing amazing about it. Not even an A for effort.
WAR HEADS
Why do people like pain in their candy. “BUT THE CENTER IS SWEET” yeah that’s if my taste buds didn’t burn off before that goddamn. Kids who liked to eat these grew up to be masochists.
Why do people like pain in their candy. “BUT THE CENTER IS SWEET” yeah that’s if my taste buds didn’t burn off before that goddamn. Kids who liked to eat these grew up to be masochists.
CRUNCH BAR
A candy bar that looks like it has a disease. Don’t even look appetizing. Basic. Ain’t even that good. Overhyped. Played out. NEXT.
A candy bar that looks like it has a disease. Don’t even look appetizing. Basic. Ain’t even that good. Overhyped. Played out. NEXT.
MILKY WAY
If Tr^mp was a 3 Muskateer then B!den is a Milky Way. Slightly more palatable but still terrible in its own (caramel coated) way.
If Tr^mp was a 3 Muskateer then B!den is a Milky Way. Slightly more palatable but still terrible in its own (caramel coated) way.
JUNIOR MINTS
If u like these, u probably like the taste of toothpaste because I’m convinced that’s what these nasty things are filled with.
If u like these, u probably like the taste of toothpaste because I’m convinced that’s what these nasty things are filled with.
Also fun fact: I actually kinda like some of these, which ones? You’ll never know. I’m just here for the mess :)
SWEDISH FISH
I got nothing snarky to say these are just straight up disgusting
I got nothing snarky to say these are just straight up disgusting
ALMOND JOY
The only people who find joy in these are middle aged women who think they’re too mature for normal chocolate or people from the Caribbean (or both). A texture NIGHTMARE.
The only people who find joy in these are middle aged women who think they’re too mature for normal chocolate or people from the Caribbean (or both). A texture NIGHTMARE.
DUM DUMS
Tootsie Pops without the nasty kaka chocolate in the middle. Basic but fine.
Tootsie Pops without the nasty kaka chocolate in the middle. Basic but fine.
CANDY CORN
If you like these you might as well stick ur hand in between the cushions of your couch and eat whatever u find because it’s probably gonna taste better than these damn things.
If you like these you might as well stick ur hand in between the cushions of your couch and eat whatever u find because it’s probably gonna taste better than these damn things.
CHARLESTON CHEW
Created around the time of the Great Depression and tastes just like it. A 3 musketeer that needs to go to therapy.
Created around the time of the Great Depression and tastes just like it. A 3 musketeer that needs to go to therapy.
DOTS
Taste like straight up GLUE. Barely edible. Idk if this should even be considered candy because I’m convinced these weren’t meant to be eaten to begin with.
Taste like straight up GLUE. Barely edible. Idk if this should even be considered candy because I’m convinced these weren’t meant to be eaten to begin with.
TOOTSIE POPS
You know what someone never said? “I want some whack ass flavored lollipops that’ll cut up the roof of my mouth when I bite into it and my reward for it is some nasty ass chocolate in the center.”
You know what someone never said? “I want some whack ass flavored lollipops that’ll cut up the roof of my mouth when I bite into it and my reward for it is some nasty ass chocolate in the center.”
BUTTERFINGER
Looks nice and crunchy, has the texture of sand. Dry as hell. Sad af. If I had to personify my depression it’d be a butterfinger.
Looks nice and crunchy, has the texture of sand. Dry as hell. Sad af. If I had to personify my depression it’d be a butterfinger.
STARBURST
Basic fruit candy. My hatred for them is personal cus I lost a tooth to one of these bricks and it was PAINFUL.
Basic fruit candy. My hatred for them is personal cus I lost a tooth to one of these bricks and it was PAINFUL.
HI-CHEW
Stop being a weeb and go eat some starburst
Stop being a weeb and go eat some starburst
WERTHER’s ORIGINAL
If you’re not old enough to retire and you like this, I’m gonna save u some time and ship u to the nearest nursing home. Literally advertised to old people.
If you’re not old enough to retire and you like this, I’m gonna save u some time and ship u to the nearest nursing home. Literally advertised to old people.
TWIX AND SNICKERS
I made the mistake of talking about these months ago, and I’m not dealing with THAT heat so I will just say this: they don’t taste that different to me ,
I made the mistake of talking about these months ago, and I’m not dealing with THAT heat so I will just say this: they don’t taste that different to me ,
TWIZZLERS
......they’re better than Red Vines.....? Just another okay-est candy. Also I’m convinced these things don’t expire which worries me
......they’re better than Red Vines.....? Just another okay-est candy. Also I’m convinced these things don’t expire which worries me
