Reasons why victims don’t come forward:

Victim-blaming: She came on to me. She wanted it.

Danger: I will beat the h out of you if you ever tell. I’ll kill your family.

Coercion: Okay, I’ll just go get your little sister.

Disbelief: She’s just looking for attention.

Cover-ups: Shh, people will lose their faith in the church. He says he’s sorry so just forgive & forget.

Rejection: You kids will be gone soon. I’ll choose your dad over you any day.

Shame: Everyone will know I’m damaged goods like my abuser says I am. No one will love me.

Protection: I don’t want to ruin anyone’s life. He says he’ll kill himself.

Isolated: Who can I tell? My abuser is my uncle, my preacher, my teacher, my youth pastor...

Resignation: It will never end.

Self-blame: If I was good, obedient, quiet...this wouldn’t happen. God must be mad at me.

So just stop with the “Why did you never say anything” garbage. It is literally the worst thing you could possibly ask a victim.