We just watched what might be the worst Bruce Willis film ever.

It's called Trauma Center and it's the most unintentionally hilarious thing I've ever seen.

Not only does it feel like the people making it have never made a movie before, it feels like they've never SEEN a movie before.

Bruce Willis is inexplicably at ELEVEN VOLUME with absolutely no reason behind it the entire film, he's yelling at everyone over nothing, but could NOT look more bored.

The freakiest thing is that Steve Guttenberg inexplicably plays a doctor, with a performance so flat it makes postcards jealous.

It is seriously my contender for the funniest terrible movie this year and that's saying something.

Flashbacks are stuck in willy-nilly with zero sense of impact on the story or characters, telling information we already know.

But the funniest thing is, the lead actress is being chased through a hospital by bad cops, and she is wearing socks and dripping blood. At one point, she steps in a puddle of blood.

But they can't find her. Stepped in blood, in socks, in a close hospital floor. Can't find her.

Later, her socks are pure white. Later still, they're black from dirt. Later still, they are red from blood.

WHERE DID SHE GO they wonder.

There's not a single believable human moment. Bruce Willis has a weird expository moment after being shot at where he reveals an important plot both he can't possibly know, TO HIMSELF, then drives off before checking to see if it's true.

Hilariously, the movie starts with the bad cops breaking into a drawer to get a phone with evidence against them, of killing a dude. Later, when they show the killing, the dead guy DROPS THE PHONE.

Somehow, the dead guy put his phone in the drawer and locked it. COOLNESS.

Also, it takes place in Puerto Rico and yet the casting seems all Australian and it SHOWS.

But the best part is, according the IMDB...the domestic gross of the movie?

Wait for it...

...$92,000.

For a Bruce Willis action movie.

How do the economics even work for something like this?

I mean, what do you pay Bruce Willis to be in a movie that makes less than the Doritos budget on a sitcom episode?

I would genuinely feel bad for the people making the movie but honest to god, it doesn't seem like they cared even remotely.

We laughed a lot and that's not normally how we watch even bad films.

I guess what I am saying is, don't watch it.

Or watch it FOURTEEN TIMES.