Short thread: The kid didn't practice as much as she should have for her state orchestra audition.

She's had three weeks, which she has mostly squandered watching tik-toc videos. She has to submit the online audition by midnight tonight.

Her orchestra teacher has emailed, reminded, and called us several times on weekends to reenforce how important it is that she nail this.

Relevant: Her orchestra teacher taught in Detroit public schools for 35 years. This man has seen some shit.

I asked if she thought he would tell us where he buries her body if she bombs this audition. I was kind of joking.

She did not think this is funny, because he told her on Friday he would bury her body where no one would ever find it if she fucks this audition up.

Suddenly, my child is very motivated to ace this audition. So she's upstairs practicing her little ass off, and hopefully learning a lesson on practice and preparedness.

I'm texting the orchestra teacher now, and we're laughing so hard. We're going to start a rumor that that's what happened to the kid in her class who left abruptly mid day and never came back.

I love this guy.