So, something I want to say.

Sometimes someone like @autisticb4mmr or @lilririah or @guardie188 or @MaidenOfCyn or a few other folks might reply to me when I'm interacting with a transphobic person and remind me it's ok to "block & disengage" because it's clearly upsetting me
That's OK. Those are people I've interacted with a lot & am mutuals with. I understand they're coming from a place of compassion and worry. And usually if they're bothering to reply something like that it's because I've clearly left my calm headspace and entered anxiety zone.
They're usually right and it can serve to interrupt my OCD cycle. That's good.

But also, those messages coming from strangers do not have the same impact - ESPECIALLY if it's from cis people. And remember, even if you know who I am doesn't mean I know who you are.
If you're cis, it's not really your place to tell trans people how to react to transphobia. Yes, this includes when you think it's for our own good. Most of the time strangers telling me that *don't understand* that often I'm able to interact without letting this stuff affect me.
More info on that statement & why I may sometimes choose to engage with transphobes in this thread https://twitter.com/A_Silent_Child/status/1320424509892030465?s=19
Even if I *am* legitimately triggered and OCD is making it difficult for me to disengage, a cis stranger instructing me to sounds a lot like them just not understanding how difficult it is to deal with transphobia and just shrug it off.

It just makes you sound privileged.
I emphasize stranger because sometimes it might be ok for some cis people to suggest disengaging, but that requires again having enough of an existing relationship to know that they're saying it because they *know me* and not because they're minimizing the harm happening.
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