One of the best things I have ever done for myself was surround myself with people who UNDERSTAND chronic illness and mental illness. My friend showed up late for birthday dinner. We modified the plan and shifted with no trouble, no tension and no frustrations.

I can remember showing up late for celebrations knowing my “friends” were going to bitch me out. Or how they would make sarcastic remarks about me being late in advance of events. How does someone justify being annoyed about potential future events?

They may as well have declared they found ME annoying. Because they took affront my lateness never realizing my nerves were shattered because of their declarations, turning it into a self fulfilling prophecy. I don’t need people like that.

Friends who spend their time pointing out what’s “wrong “ with you that you need to “fix” without any attempt to understand are NOT FRIENDS. I’m not saying that people need to accept anything we throw at them, but I need flexibility and if they can’t give it? Don’t befriend me.

So when people ask me how they can stop annoying their friends I’m always thinking “are you sure you want to be friends with someone who thinks you’re annoying?” Because sometimes it isn’t our friends holding us accountable, it’s them using you to have someone to feel superior to