Coping with ptsd while continuing an abusive living arrangement shows a problem with attachment, self-worth and believing I've an ability to cope alone.

It's why so many of us remain.

It seems inconceivable I'ld retain a roof, survivable healthcare and proper food if I left.

My self doubt comes with decades of baggage, aging poorly and a belief my situation has no alternative.

I've said this for nearing 36 years. That's quite ban investment and the baggage from the root of my ptsd contributes immensely to this unending torment.

There are others who understand why the abused stay.

How many of those cringe inside when asked by any healthcare provider whether they feel safe at home?

Cheerfully replying yes.

Shamed.

What a headtrip.

The abuse web doesn't appear solvable to those trapped.

I have to listen to things that interrupt my daily pain and heartbreak.

Chester sang about things I understand.

These were many years after I experienced mine. The problem of proper treatments for ptsd are lives like mine.

I have had the therapy I needed 40 years after the worst. It is a very good thing.

"One More Light"

Never dry eyes after "One More Light"

I have no idea whether this thread merits a response. I do something like this a few times a year. Trauma informed people might think this is venting? I too think that, but inside there's a yearning to hear a lot of others share their experience with any of this.