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It's been a really long day, Are you done Temmie or do you need some more time to display?
I had been silent all through everything because I wasn't ready to speak about the ordeal that was meeting and dating you, but you have forced my hands so here we go.
I had been silent all through everything because I wasn't ready to speak about the ordeal that was meeting and dating you, but you have forced my hands so here we go.
Although I didn't ask for it, Thank you Olive @_zayit_ for speaking up for me and Temmie's other victims. I wasn't ready to be out but here we are.
1.I met Temiloluwa Ovwasa aka YBNL Princess in December, 2019 at a Queer event. She and her then girlfriend Aisha, alongside other people, hitched a ride with me and I took them home. This was my first unfortunate encounter with Temmie Ovwasa.
http://2.In January/February (can't remember), Temiloluwa Ovwasa called me saying that Aisha aka Respect had hit her and she was on her way to Ibadan, as a concern friend at the time, I followed up with her and made sure she was fine in Ibadan.
3. I took her out to a really lovely restaurant in Ibadan where I paid the bills all the way from Lagos. All to make her comfortable and feel better. I sent her some money.
3.We continued talking and we got closer. She stated that following her ordeal with Aisha aka Reespect, she was not comfortable going back to her house. I told her to come to mine, until she feels safe enough to go home.
4. In March, after a weekend getaway that I paid for, I asked Temmie to be my girlfriend. We started dating. This was the beginning of my woes.
5. Everything seemed sweet and rosy, we were having alot of sex, I put her on a monthly allowance, she had access to my ATM cards that she used as she pleased. I just really wanted to show her that there was love in the world. I loved and cared her with everything in me.
6. As with all relationships, ours had its fair share of fights and ups and downs. Temmie had also mentioned that she was battling a mental illness, so I made sure not to take anything personal. COVID-19 came and we quarantined together. Another grave mistake of my life.
7. Then I started noticing that she was being deliberate with some of her actions. Temmie would get angry and try to start physical fights with me. She would punch my chest, hit me, shout and do ridiculous things. I never hit her nor retaliated in the same vein.
8. Instead, I would calm her down and apologize for whatever it is that got her upset.
9. There were days when Temmie would hold my small knife as she tries to fight with me. She would look me in my eye, cut herself with blade and say that if anything happened to her I would be held responsible and other manipulative things.
10. She would throw things and destroy my house. I confided in my friends about what was happening, and everybody told me to get out, a couple of people got to know about this including my friend @_zayit_ , who got to know later on.
11. But where would I go to when there was a lockdown? I also couldn't chase her out of my house for the same reason, but more so because I was in love with her. After every episode, I would hold her and apologize to her.
12. On one of the occasions, she had threatened me with the knife and I legit felt my life was in emitment danger. I called my lawyer and a security service to help me get her out of my house.
13. I also went ahead to lodge a formal complaint at Ojodu police station, in case anything happened to me.
But I loved Temmie Ovwasa and I forgave everything and still keep her in my house.
But I loved Temmie Ovwasa and I forgave everything and still keep her in my house.
14. On another occasion, I was having severe chest pain as I have mild hypertension, and Temmie did not allow me go out to get my drugs, as my dose had finished. I had to sneak text a friend to help me get drugs and bring them to my house.
15. Still I stayed. Fuck love to be honest.
17.Temiloluwa Ovwasa came up one day and said she was tired of regular sex, and she wanted BSDM. She said she wanted something called "consent non-consent". She specifically said, " I want you to fuck me till I pass out".
18. I agreed to this and we had consensal sex. At no point during this experience did Temmie tell me to stop and I didn't. I want to categorically state that I did not rape Temmie Ovwasa.
19. Everytime I tried to break up with Temmie, she would bring up different things and try to make it seem like I was abusive to her, I was scared of being labelled an abuser and so I stayed.
20. One time Temmie threatened to run away with my 7million naira worth of bonds and I told her that I would get boys to hold her. Temmie said that that was a rape joke. I immediately apologized for it, even though I didn't understand how it was a rape joke. I just wanted peace.
21. I have never seen anyone manipulate their mental illness like Temmie.
At some points, I ran away from my house and slept at my sister's place. I would wake up early and walk to my friend's house to cry. Fuck!
At some points, I ran away from my house and slept at my sister's place. I would wake up early and walk to my friend's house to cry. Fuck!
22. Even after lockdown, she would not leave my house. I reached out to an older queer friend to ask her how to ask Temmie to leave my house without making her feel bad. It took alot to get her to leave my house but still we continued dating.
23. When we broke up, Temmie sent me a long DM stating that I had raped her during that BDSM and a plethora of things and then she blocked me. I tried calling her and she had blocked me, I sent her an email to state that I saw her messages.
24. I expressed my disappointment in what she was doing but I still continued to send her money because I honestly thought I could love her into being a human being.
25. Later on, she called me and said that she was sorry and she would like to have a picnic with me to get back together. She sent me pictures of a beach that she had found for a picnic. It then dawned on me that I was being used, and blackmailed, it was a plan.
26. I decided to play along, I sent her an email proposing for us to go on a getaway together and fix ourselves, she instantly jumped on the offer for a getaway. She replied saying that she loved me and she would like to go on a getaway with me.
27. I ignored her response. Temmie called me to ask if I had seen her response to the email and where I would like to take her to, I told her that I didn't get her response and Temmie sent it again. I was then sure that she was with me for the wrong reasons.
28. I decided to ghost her and ignore her completely. She called me to no avail. she noticed that I had gone for good, she sent me yet another long text message. That's one of the "evidences" she has pulled out on Twitter today, I responded and told her off, I told her off.
http://26.Fast forward to today, I woke up and see that Temmie Ovwasa was calling me a rapist on Twitter.
30. I panicked. I panicked because I am a queer woman in homophobic Nigeria. My jobs were on the line, I had worked too hard for someone to violently out me and at the same time accuse me of rape. It was like seeing my world crash before my eyes.
31. I called @_zayit_ to know what was happening, I called everyone I could to talk to help me. I called Matthew, and other people to reach out to her to take down this malicious accusation.
32. One of her friends that I reached out to, told me to call her and reason with her. I called Temmie, I begged her to delete the tweet before my employers saw it and before it gained any form of traction. I told her that my jobs were on the line,
33. I pleaded with her. Temmie insisted that I must admit to raping her before she would delete it, she said I should ask Olive to take down her tweets too and then she would delete it.
34. Still panicking, I agreed to all her requests, I just didn't want to be jobless and outed anymore. I called @_zayit_ to delete her tweets, I called Temmie again to beg her yet again. I just wanted the nightmare to end. I was calling my abuser to beg.
35. Immediately @_zayit_ deleted her tweets, her accounts got hacked. I called her to ask her to apologize to Temmie and she told me that her account was hacked. She gave me her log in details to help her regain her accounts. I tried but I couldn't
36. I called Temmie again still in tears, begging her. I told her the situation of things I explained to her. There was nothing I could do. She still refused to delete her tweets. She instead recorded my calls and is using them as me admitting.
37. Temmie has a pattern of abuse. A long list of victims that are mostly silent because they just don't want to relive the nightmare that was their experience with her.
38. I am not the only one, she preys on people that she knows want to be silent. She outs you, blackmails you, manipulates you and physically harms you.
39. I know that after this my precious jobs that I had worked so hard to keep might be gone. Everything that I had worked towards all gone, because my abuser is a devil. Temmie Ovwasa I hope you are happy now. I really pray you get the help you need.
40. Half the queer community know what you are but they are silent because there's really nowhere to turn to for help to be honest.
41. Even when she was called out, she didn't even know which of her victims was calling her out. She went ahead and dragged someone else and did this exact same thing. She brought out things to blackmail the person.
42. The truth is even if I lose everything I have worked for, atleast I can finally sleep without fear. I can breathe again, my abuser is finally powerless.
43. I hope the truth prevails.
