I just want to address something important. Privacy.

Your eyes are in the front of your head and your feet point forward for a reason. Because you are meant to look ahead and move forward.

So it is with each person you encounter. What's behind them is none of your business.

Meaning the personal past is none of your business. Information is dispensed on a need to know basis. If it's none of your concern then leave it. Gossip is the highest form of non violent personal assault against another. I consider it fatal to a relationship and instant grounds

for dismissal. You wouldn't dig through someone's personal effects when they weren't looking. So don't dig into their personal past. We are here now. Honour boundaries people set. Remember you have boundaries you want honoured and this is what we're actually fighting for,

as it happens. I have a dark past, as you can imagine if you read that thread. It would be deeply hurtful if it were used against me because someone who abused me surfaced and injected chaos and someone who didn't like me fell into that chaos. It's a fear I have.

So, this is another reason don't join groups. I felt very close to making an exception this time and now I'm glad I hesitated because I have observed some things that have eroded my fragile trust.

As I've said those you soldier with you must be able to trust with your life.

I don't see that level of emotional maturity or intelligence. I don't see the level of intellectual rigour required. I do and then there are pockets of narcissism which overpower the rest.

I guess I'm a free agent. I will have to take the chance that my past is a vulnerability.

Because the issue at hand is more important than I am.

Because I live based on values and not against the mental effigy of a scapegoat I'm burning at the stake inside my head.

I'm somewhat disappointed at what I see in human beings.

If I were to ask myself that old Sufi question, "how is your heart?" I would answer, simply, "heavy to carry."

I guess that means I have to go harder and love bigger and wider. The instinct is to want to contract.

That is when to expand and step in. Take a deep breath, remember the immense change in the world which happened over the course of my own mother's lifetime. Keep fighting. Carry on.

I love the inspiration the UK feminists have given me and the spirit they show .

/end thread