Lately I& #39;m feeling like I& #39;m going nowhere with my life, I can& #39;t draw at all and I feel always sad
I had to skip uni for this year and when I see all my friends living the life that I& #39;d like for myself I feel absolutely terrible
I& #39;m also terrible worried for my 11 y/o dog >
Who is suggering from herniated disc(?) and the vet expenses are really high
I& #39;m using the money that I& #39;ve been saving for uni because I can& #39;t afford to lose him, expecially not when I feel like I don& #39;t have anyone with me
All my friends are telling me "you shold work so you can earn some money and go to uni next year" but the problem is that I& #39;m living with my 100% disabled dad and my 13 y/o sister and I have to do all the housework
I have some physical(?) problems myself and I& #39;m always tired
The only time that I have for myself is late night, before going to sleep at 2/3 AM
I feel like life is really testing me, and I can& #39;t see a "bright future" ahead me
Everytime that I try to draw something I don& #39;t like it at all, I see beautiful fanarts and I& #39;m like "why I can& #39;t do this, what is wrong with me" and I& #39;m starting to think that maybe this isn& #39;t for me and I should find a "normal" work
It hurts like hell seeing that I& #39;m losing myself
I don& #39;t have hope, I don& #39;t have strenght
I& #39;m useless, everyone is leaving me behind and I should only disappear from everyone lives

I want to run away, run away from this house and from this life. I don& #39;t want to see my dad& #39;s parents anymore, they treat me like shit only because I& #39;m not my father& #39;s real daughter
I& #39;m sorry if someone had to read all this things...I& #39;d really want to erase these thoughts from my mind

Might cancel this thread later but I needed to write it somewhere
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