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Shopping for a new desk is proving trickier than I had anticipated. You'd think it's so simple – just a table, basically, right?? – and yet, the details and proportions need to be within a specific margin or they're WRONG. Truly the formal menswear of furnishings.
Some terrible things people have done to wood and tried to sell as a place where you'd spend your working hours: It's The Bad Desk Thread!
1. "Don Draper's divorce lawyer is a vampire." https://www.cb2.com/kent-mahogany-desk/s584799
1. "Don Draper's divorce lawyer is a vampire." https://www.cb2.com/kent-mahogany-desk/s584799
2. Weathered haunted house modernism. That boxy frame! Those stunted little stubs! Contains no less than three ghosts that have been foreclosed upon. Yours for a cool $1449 + shipping! https://www.crateandbarrel.com/monroe-dark-wood-executive-desk/s337755
3. This is the scene of business card comparisons in American Psycho, in desk form. This desk really wants to tell you about Huey Lewis and the News. It's also appropriately confused about whether it wants to be retro or retrofuturistic. https://www.crateandbarrel.com/clybourn-cocoa-executive-desk/s328075
4. Secretary for a noir villain/vanity for your femme fatale. This thing better have a hidden gun compartment or my name's not Sam Spade. https://www.westelm.com/products/bower-console-table-h6255/?pkey=coffice-desks
5. "Trust me. I'm an architect." - someone who isn't an architect https://www.westelm.com/products/reclaimed-wood-lacquer-desk-h2586/?pkey=coffice-desks
6. This desk is cosplaying as an airplane hanger. Looking at this feels like doing math. Not in a good way. (Is there a good way?) https://www.kardiel.com/1949-protractor-98-desk-walnut/
7. A collection of spare parts that are about to accuse me of being a Soviet Agent: https://www.kardiel.com/dream-59-desk-walnut/
8. The side of the barn where...The Incident happened. (We don't talk about the Incident.) https://www.crateandbarrel.com/phoenix-72-work-table/s495980?localedetail=US&a=1552&campaignid=10461646935&adgroupid=103999389579&targetid=pla-937611460489&pla_sku=495980&pcat=FURN&ag=adult&scid=scplp495980&sc_intid=495980&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI1uSc4eXN7AIVA4vICh3QlQBgEAQYDCABEgIaUPD_BwE
