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One of the “fun” parts of being undiagnosed for so long was having to retell my story over and over again. It made sense when I would see a new doctor. Though it was frustrating each time.
I’m a good historian. I would always painstakingly detail each procedure and medicine I had trialed and all of the rule outs I’ve had over the years.
But it was very frustrating when every single resident I saw demanded to hear my entire story from scratch.
But it was very frustrating when every single resident I saw demanded to hear my entire story from scratch.
I’ve been seeing the same GI for 3 years now. Yet every single resident that rotates with him demands to hear my full story. “I want to hear the story for myself.” It was an exhausting part of every single visit, especially since I’d see my actual doc after anyway.
I know doctors are human. But I’m human too. And having to jump through the same hoops every time was exhausting. “Any major life changes in Jan 2017? What are your stress levels like? Any accidents or traumas your experienced in 2017?”
All of my doctors are within the same hospital system, all using EPIC. They all had access to my stories, but demanded I retell them over and over.
“Metformin can cause diarrhea! Maybe that’s it?”
“You’re the 9th person to ask. I started Metformin a year after I got sick.”
“Metformin can cause diarrhea! Maybe that’s it?”
“You’re the 9th person to ask. I started Metformin a year after I got sick.”
Having to do all of my own research for my diagnosis, having to constantly advocate for myself, hitting walls with each new specialist, all while being so sick I could barely function... it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
I’ll never forget the dismissive doctors. “Well I can conclude that you’re not dying, so just be happy with that and learn to live with it.”
“Have you considered CBT to compartmentalize your pain?”
“Have you considered CBT to compartmentalize your pain?”
But I also won’t forget my pain doctor’s gentle eyes when he asked if I knew the signs of dehydration, and asked if he could follow my chart for the next few weeks to make sure I was okay. I ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks the next day.
Your patients remember how you treat them. An average day for you could be a monumental day they’ve been waiting for for months, thinking “maybe THIS doctor will find out why I feel like my body is being ripped apart?”
By 2019, I stopped crying after each specialist visit. I came to expect the lack of answers and the dismissals. How sad is that?
Be mindful of each and every interaction you have with a patient. As a therapist, as a nurse, as a PA, as a doctor. Patients remember your words. They’re likely already struggling if they’re seeing you. It costs nothing to be kind. Even if you don’t know the answers.
