I know I mentioned it before but,

Realizing I was burnt out was a relief.

For years I would beat myself up for not finishing things, or not doing more.

Now I see that I was just pushing myself too hard. I never considered that I had a limit

I don’t ever remember seeing my mom take a break.

She would always be up at dawn, would be up way into the night. Worked long hours and still cooked and cleaned.

I don’t think that was healthy, but she did it.

So to me, I internalized that I’m supposed to keep going

It never occurred to me that, that shit is not Normal, nor is it healthy

So it’s not that I’m a failure.

I’m fucking human, and I need balance

All these years... beating myself up wow